Truly a work that gives breathe of life to a condition of a place and yea, how sparse it is to encounter good folks and life dating lessons too.
If truly I wanted to beg for girls/woman to "give me a chance to love them" I would say and do.
Me; (gets down on knee)
Girl; ....what are you doing?
Crowd; (they are a couple and he is proposing)
Me; Please don't leave! I really do think you should give me a chance!
Girl;nope.
me; you'll truly be missing out on me!
Girl; you? Ha are you CASH MONEY, the rapper. Nope.
me; you did not even give me a chance to say anything about myself. You are just pushing yourself as everything. I am more than your projection. I am me.
me; I can see something good with us together, please, don't give up on me.
Girl; women have come so far in time and place that really enough you are just a male who would be so hindering. Do I want to even be trapped with you for life or death! I don't need to know you, I already know you by your looks and my preferences and I know how life is going to work out!
Me; okay.
Me; (raises up)
Crowd looks with shocked eyes and whisper," she turned him down".
Girl; do you have any cash on you, I don't have enough to get back home today.
Me; Nope.
Now, really I think of myself as a gift from god but literally when people cross bounds that are preferencial to dismissing you have a self, well-you friends don't need to be bothered by them at all. Nope, they for all their gaudy image and maybe characters you thought you saw were just miscommunicated images you only think because you are opportunistic to find someone in that olde educational set up. Yet this person never will meet the conditions of even being "civil" even enough to even date or even talk to much. All the characteristics you see and possibly do are just what you see alone and maybe whilst they might have certain traits and talents, they chose to hinder theirselves for a lesser quality and their idea of chasing in life is something self harming, depriving and equally depraving. They expect the world to come for them and that their dream individual will find their way to them with no effort on the part of them even being social or communicable or even nice.Its best to leave these people alone and when you beg you sound desperate. No one who is actually a real catch would make you beg when you have done nothing wrong but exist. There are troubled and greatly mentally troubled people out there who think that you ever existing and trying to interacting with them is blocking them from meeting their dream individual! Especially when they do nothing at all but laze around socially and never do anything conductive to even putting out a look for this person. They expect it all will resolve itself and that is how people end up alone really. Especially even if they did try to search for this ideal person based off maybe warped dreams that they would not exist. Seriously, you don't need to be wasting time with bonkers people who don't want to do any social work or want to respect people as people but only want to expect and ideal image and form. Those things are never love especially paired with lust.
This is not dating advice however friends, I find it is something to note about the girls I met in spring 2017. Dear me oh my, I believe I would be able to cover much of the stories that happen at the time through them and more than others. I mean some people who truly were nice to me and treated me like a person-you really never had to beg them to be nice; they just were good people. Other people on the other hand think you sharing your taste of punk rock music is coming onto them when you are supposed to be friends. I would say is that you never talk about music with people who really have a loss for knowledge of things and liberty and even basic knowledge that people aren't stereotypes and can listen to what ever music they fucking want and they are not the boss of you. Ardently, never communicate with people who have trash friends who always take any valid excuse to say bullshit about you which in reality is just because they want to spite you. The little women will always allow outsiders to guide whatever relationship becomes and that means you are worth nothing to them when everyone else has a say in what goes in between you two and its more a relationship between five people or 4 girls speaking into one. Anyways, that is just to describe some people who seem to take simple things and give them life that is never meant. I mean like,"wha?" People will literally come out with any bullshit to quote and quote, " peel you off of them because they are so desirable".
I mean no one is thinking that but them. But noticeably folks red flags exist and they should be heeded because one friend like lets call her barsum anna basically took all the above and turned it into her own little defense party to not treat people well and think people have ideals of them that they don't. Hated the fact people had lives and characters past her closeted hick world definition. Hated the fact that really she felt somehow pressured to speak to someone when no one was ever forcing her. Always allowed other friends to basically downgrade the friendship into one of a negative influence and worrisome tirade not worth her time. Worse is that they placed meanings where they had none and never clarified what ever they were thinking and placed blame on other people. The definition of fucking crazy. There were few good people in spring 2017. There were many crazy people. It was like the rise of "Bambi's with rabies". I do not kid you at all. There were many of these type of girls but barsum anna was the worst of them. She knew you more than the others and was an actual friend. Who decided that you needed to suffer and that you needed to be hurt and you needed to be lowered to less than an animal to have any pleasure in her life. I am pretty sure today, the girl did what she did to spite me and continue the ideal that anyone cared about her relationship with some stranger you never met in person. It made me consider never being friends with another woman who was in relationship again but this analysis was not far off the mark. It seems some people seem entitled to a dreamy fantasy not to tout my own horn but that is what it is. How can you explain how these people just hate you for talking with them and likely never much really see them at all? Anyways this "friend" of mine basically betrayed my trust with her insanity and basically threw me under the bus. I mean people need friends and well she was the only person I truly had any sentences in with. Not even a good friend she was but she was helpful in talking about daily events at the school. This did help in a terrible place as that place I went to but then again realize that maybe you don't need such a piss poor friend who will for some reason never trust you enough to be around you as if the item was racially motivated. You don't need such a friend. Especially when they are keen to throw you under the bus. The woman when provoked by the notions of this "not being a real friendship" and noticed I was mocking the "limits of the friendship " preferably in that direction she was so keenly thinking immediately said the whole thing was "inappropriate". Truly this girl only cared about herself and could never care about how I felt ever at all and really was just a flaming trashheap.
She only later continued to speak about me in public like everyone in that time. Really much there was no trust from the start but misconceptions of it on my part. She had no trust in me. But this was a backstab realization that one-this person had not ability to recognize other's feelings and even noticing when people were calling them out on their bullshit so that there would be a discussion on how things should truly be as friends. I ardently took what could have been my part to keep her as a friend and just dumped it because friendships are not and I repeat aren't one fucking sided. There was no friend I realize but the girl would only continue to harrass me every time I would come near here with these notions that she was so important and I was not. I used to be facebook friends with this person yet they went and blocked me after I basically just let them talk their bullshit and jumped ship. One of the most disgusting people I have ever met if not most racist.I assume that one black dude she hung with, she assumed was "neutered" or a friendly consort guy who basically was "safe" because he believed his purpose was just to be her dog. Literally though, what is interesting enough is that the behavior of what people were saying about me-pure strangers seemed to be coming from her. And well if a person speaks loud enough for you to hear from a great distance-it is them. It is the reassuring nature of how she spoke of me that she did not realize what she had done and I was just letting her pretend to be the "keeper of reality". She could live and freaking die with the image that I was a bad person but any sane person knows and just would know if you were to read any of the texts between us that she was in the wrong. Personally, I was being nice as this person was two years younger than me and really thought she was childish and too childish to actually take the full impact of being not let off easily. I gave her that and she talked as if she owned the world and what she thought was just as it was. Maybe enough, this girl herself was the one spreading rumors. So basically friends never mess around with people who don't feel right and mainly in their eyes-don't look right. I have been through some things and let me tell you- the looks in people's eyes; tells you who they are! In the 2015, 2016 and even early 2017 time period, I though this was just suspersition thought with no scientific background but it has merit after you go through many things and just waste lots of times with bad people especially with the little women of the world. If you looked in that person's eyes when she spoke-they were harden but darting rapidly as if to sell the lie to their followers and others. It was sick. It was twisted and really I felt as if I gave too much mercy to this person to behave in an unforgiving way that was compromising my productivity and my safety. This person was still trapped in highschool. But she was just the highest thug I would come across. The others were equally as childish and some even more racist.
How? Imagine you see this bright highschool kid or someone near 18 or in the age level of the community college and he comes into this community lab full of smiles and full of life to talk to this red head with freckles. I mean this guy is just a normal dude who has seen a girl who is attractive to him and is trying in a roundabout manner to talk to her about his feelings and get her aboard with dating him. Sort of like me at the time but all my naviety was gone and so was my energy-I never really had it to begin with because well you keep on thinking how things are doomed from the start and well his whole deal was doomed from the start. Oh, they were talking in that computer lab I sat in the back and laughed at each other and they were "having the time of their lives". Where am I going with this. You imagine some weeks later this guy hooks up with this person around his age and they start dating. Oh, you would be wrong because community college and its folks are racists and even worse is that not only does this girl who is the lab monitor who checks people into the whole racist idealism but an actual administrative fucking adult is. They were laughing so much and talking so well and then the guy leaves with a happy face and thinks he has a chance and then the unthinkable happens.
The girl sighs and the adult woman who is to take her place as the next shift worker in the lab who is at least 40 to maybe 50 fucking years old chimes in and says to the girl as she is to leave,"He just not getting a clue". The girl said, " yas" like a fucking cat. But not the meme it was more like "yes" but a hiss. I mean, brutal; the girl put on such an act when it was never so and the poor dude is wasting his time and worse is being mocked by not only 20 something year old person but a 40 fucking year old person. They carried on a rather deligent conversation after that which reminds you of highschool drama. Trash people. This old fucking lady said," how is your engagement coming on". So friends, this shit had been going on for awhile. This 20 something year old and her 40 year old fucking pal playing mean girls to one misguided dude who ," had no clue". I think to say from my standpoint whilst the older woman did not sound vicious when she said her first say, she pretty much was instigating shit and well," no clue" basically could be known as "stupid". Especially in the context of then switching from mocking the boy to talking about this girl's finance as if he was superior and "everyone should know that". You fucking fool. You fucking slur word used towards black people. So basically the old woman was fucked up and really no one was going to ever tell the guy that she was engaged. No one. Not even the girl. Not the forty fucking shady woman who should not be delving into people who are basically kids' business compared to her. I am to tell you friends this one fucking woman was not the least of that community college's problems with unprofessional behavior. Yes, so the two of them were easy going in hatred to string this guy along. I felt a great relation to that guy and that is how it mostly just goes with these people who are racists. The two women were white but you can say the type of white people who are so fucking underground in places where they don't see anyone but other strange white people. They were so fucking odd. If it is any consulation being forty years old, overweight and picking on boys who are twenty years old is probably a bad place to be at when you an older adult especially working as a lab assistant or monitor. The girl in my opinion was ugly, she had freckles and those were not pretty in my opinion maybe it was because she basically was just dragging this guy on false pretenses to do him great harm and I thought of her as a witch and she did look like one. Ardently she was ugly inside and out and whilst they spoke about that student who was asking about a calculus tutor to the girl as her being a lab assistant; it was fucked up I thought to myself. He is going to ask one day and end up like Emmet Till. That is what I thought. It was a moment of dread and well these two asshats could never feel anything but envy for normalcy. The girl thought I was eyeing her another day in the lab. I was actual restraining myself from saying anything to the person and her trifling ways. I don't know how I looked but this person thought I was checking her out. But this guy who was actually smart probably never heard from her on her serious deception. I never seen such in my life of people being so doublesome and doublesided and it so freaking nauseating that guy basically walked everyday into a trap and any closer would be framed in a fucking nightmare. Oh, one in which dear husband to be is "permitted" to think and I say permitted to think he must shot this guy because he is messing with his to be wife. Sick shit but that was that community college and its women and it was not only me apparently.
I paint this large picture to tell you that you never have to apologize, hide who you are or be fake friendly with people when they are for you and with you and not against you. True and true.
Yes, I am to tell you that I never went out of my way to get involved and tell that guy to not be bothered with the girl but I frankly could not take anymore hits from that place and every time I would even be out-I would take a fucking hit and it-the hit was from unwanted attention. The doublesome in its full intrigue;racism in pure if not highschool blown over drama from a backstabbing "friend" and her chatty mystical rumor mill ways to incite racial horror.
Me; (gets down on knee)
Girl; ....what are you doing?
Crowd; (they are a couple and he is proposing)
Me; Please don't leave! I really do think you should give me a chance!
Girl;nope.
me; you'll truly be missing out on me!
Girl; you? Ha are you CASH MONEY, the rapper. Nope.
me; you did not even give me a chance to say anything about myself. You are just pushing yourself as everything. I am more than your projection. I am me.
me; I can see something good with us together, please, don't give up on me.
Girl; women have come so far in time and place that really enough you are just a male who would be so hindering. Do I want to even be trapped with you for life or death! I don't need to know you, I already know you by your looks and my preferences and I know how life is going to work out!
Me; okay.
Me; (raises up)
Crowd looks with shocked eyes and whisper," she turned him down".
Girl; do you have any cash on you, I don't have enough to get back home today.
Me; Nope.
Now, really I think of myself as a gift from god but literally when people cross bounds that are preferencial to dismissing you have a self, well-you friends don't need to be bothered by them at all. Nope, they for all their gaudy image and maybe characters you thought you saw were just miscommunicated images you only think because you are opportunistic to find someone in that olde educational set up. Yet this person never will meet the conditions of even being "civil" even enough to even date or even talk to much. All the characteristics you see and possibly do are just what you see alone and maybe whilst they might have certain traits and talents, they chose to hinder theirselves for a lesser quality and their idea of chasing in life is something self harming, depriving and equally depraving. They expect the world to come for them and that their dream individual will find their way to them with no effort on the part of them even being social or communicable or even nice.Its best to leave these people alone and when you beg you sound desperate. No one who is actually a real catch would make you beg when you have done nothing wrong but exist. There are troubled and greatly mentally troubled people out there who think that you ever existing and trying to interacting with them is blocking them from meeting their dream individual! Especially when they do nothing at all but laze around socially and never do anything conductive to even putting out a look for this person. They expect it all will resolve itself and that is how people end up alone really. Especially even if they did try to search for this ideal person based off maybe warped dreams that they would not exist. Seriously, you don't need to be wasting time with bonkers people who don't want to do any social work or want to respect people as people but only want to expect and ideal image and form. Those things are never love especially paired with lust.
This is not dating advice however friends, I find it is something to note about the girls I met in spring 2017. Dear me oh my, I believe I would be able to cover much of the stories that happen at the time through them and more than others. I mean some people who truly were nice to me and treated me like a person-you really never had to beg them to be nice; they just were good people. Other people on the other hand think you sharing your taste of punk rock music is coming onto them when you are supposed to be friends. I would say is that you never talk about music with people who really have a loss for knowledge of things and liberty and even basic knowledge that people aren't stereotypes and can listen to what ever music they fucking want and they are not the boss of you. Ardently, never communicate with people who have trash friends who always take any valid excuse to say bullshit about you which in reality is just because they want to spite you. The little women will always allow outsiders to guide whatever relationship becomes and that means you are worth nothing to them when everyone else has a say in what goes in between you two and its more a relationship between five people or 4 girls speaking into one. Anyways, that is just to describe some people who seem to take simple things and give them life that is never meant. I mean like,"wha?" People will literally come out with any bullshit to quote and quote, " peel you off of them because they are so desirable".
I mean no one is thinking that but them. But noticeably folks red flags exist and they should be heeded because one friend like lets call her barsum anna basically took all the above and turned it into her own little defense party to not treat people well and think people have ideals of them that they don't. Hated the fact people had lives and characters past her closeted hick world definition. Hated the fact that really she felt somehow pressured to speak to someone when no one was ever forcing her. Always allowed other friends to basically downgrade the friendship into one of a negative influence and worrisome tirade not worth her time. Worse is that they placed meanings where they had none and never clarified what ever they were thinking and placed blame on other people. The definition of fucking crazy. There were few good people in spring 2017. There were many crazy people. It was like the rise of "Bambi's with rabies". I do not kid you at all. There were many of these type of girls but barsum anna was the worst of them. She knew you more than the others and was an actual friend. Who decided that you needed to suffer and that you needed to be hurt and you needed to be lowered to less than an animal to have any pleasure in her life. I am pretty sure today, the girl did what she did to spite me and continue the ideal that anyone cared about her relationship with some stranger you never met in person. It made me consider never being friends with another woman who was in relationship again but this analysis was not far off the mark. It seems some people seem entitled to a dreamy fantasy not to tout my own horn but that is what it is. How can you explain how these people just hate you for talking with them and likely never much really see them at all? Anyways this "friend" of mine basically betrayed my trust with her insanity and basically threw me under the bus. I mean people need friends and well she was the only person I truly had any sentences in with. Not even a good friend she was but she was helpful in talking about daily events at the school. This did help in a terrible place as that place I went to but then again realize that maybe you don't need such a piss poor friend who will for some reason never trust you enough to be around you as if the item was racially motivated. You don't need such a friend. Especially when they are keen to throw you under the bus. The woman when provoked by the notions of this "not being a real friendship" and noticed I was mocking the "limits of the friendship " preferably in that direction she was so keenly thinking immediately said the whole thing was "inappropriate". Truly this girl only cared about herself and could never care about how I felt ever at all and really was just a flaming trashheap.
She only later continued to speak about me in public like everyone in that time. Really much there was no trust from the start but misconceptions of it on my part. She had no trust in me. But this was a backstab realization that one-this person had not ability to recognize other's feelings and even noticing when people were calling them out on their bullshit so that there would be a discussion on how things should truly be as friends. I ardently took what could have been my part to keep her as a friend and just dumped it because friendships are not and I repeat aren't one fucking sided. There was no friend I realize but the girl would only continue to harrass me every time I would come near here with these notions that she was so important and I was not. I used to be facebook friends with this person yet they went and blocked me after I basically just let them talk their bullshit and jumped ship. One of the most disgusting people I have ever met if not most racist.I assume that one black dude she hung with, she assumed was "neutered" or a friendly consort guy who basically was "safe" because he believed his purpose was just to be her dog. Literally though, what is interesting enough is that the behavior of what people were saying about me-pure strangers seemed to be coming from her. And well if a person speaks loud enough for you to hear from a great distance-it is them. It is the reassuring nature of how she spoke of me that she did not realize what she had done and I was just letting her pretend to be the "keeper of reality". She could live and freaking die with the image that I was a bad person but any sane person knows and just would know if you were to read any of the texts between us that she was in the wrong. Personally, I was being nice as this person was two years younger than me and really thought she was childish and too childish to actually take the full impact of being not let off easily. I gave her that and she talked as if she owned the world and what she thought was just as it was. Maybe enough, this girl herself was the one spreading rumors. So basically friends never mess around with people who don't feel right and mainly in their eyes-don't look right. I have been through some things and let me tell you- the looks in people's eyes; tells you who they are! In the 2015, 2016 and even early 2017 time period, I though this was just suspersition thought with no scientific background but it has merit after you go through many things and just waste lots of times with bad people especially with the little women of the world. If you looked in that person's eyes when she spoke-they were harden but darting rapidly as if to sell the lie to their followers and others. It was sick. It was twisted and really I felt as if I gave too much mercy to this person to behave in an unforgiving way that was compromising my productivity and my safety. This person was still trapped in highschool. But she was just the highest thug I would come across. The others were equally as childish and some even more racist.
How? Imagine you see this bright highschool kid or someone near 18 or in the age level of the community college and he comes into this community lab full of smiles and full of life to talk to this red head with freckles. I mean this guy is just a normal dude who has seen a girl who is attractive to him and is trying in a roundabout manner to talk to her about his feelings and get her aboard with dating him. Sort of like me at the time but all my naviety was gone and so was my energy-I never really had it to begin with because well you keep on thinking how things are doomed from the start and well his whole deal was doomed from the start. Oh, they were talking in that computer lab I sat in the back and laughed at each other and they were "having the time of their lives". Where am I going with this. You imagine some weeks later this guy hooks up with this person around his age and they start dating. Oh, you would be wrong because community college and its folks are racists and even worse is that not only does this girl who is the lab monitor who checks people into the whole racist idealism but an actual administrative fucking adult is. They were laughing so much and talking so well and then the guy leaves with a happy face and thinks he has a chance and then the unthinkable happens.
The girl sighs and the adult woman who is to take her place as the next shift worker in the lab who is at least 40 to maybe 50 fucking years old chimes in and says to the girl as she is to leave,"He just not getting a clue". The girl said, " yas" like a fucking cat. But not the meme it was more like "yes" but a hiss. I mean, brutal; the girl put on such an act when it was never so and the poor dude is wasting his time and worse is being mocked by not only 20 something year old person but a 40 fucking year old person. They carried on a rather deligent conversation after that which reminds you of highschool drama. Trash people. This old fucking lady said," how is your engagement coming on". So friends, this shit had been going on for awhile. This 20 something year old and her 40 year old fucking pal playing mean girls to one misguided dude who ," had no clue". I think to say from my standpoint whilst the older woman did not sound vicious when she said her first say, she pretty much was instigating shit and well," no clue" basically could be known as "stupid". Especially in the context of then switching from mocking the boy to talking about this girl's finance as if he was superior and "everyone should know that". You fucking fool. You fucking slur word used towards black people. So basically the old woman was fucked up and really no one was going to ever tell the guy that she was engaged. No one. Not even the girl. Not the forty fucking shady woman who should not be delving into people who are basically kids' business compared to her. I am to tell you friends this one fucking woman was not the least of that community college's problems with unprofessional behavior. Yes, so the two of them were easy going in hatred to string this guy along. I felt a great relation to that guy and that is how it mostly just goes with these people who are racists. The two women were white but you can say the type of white people who are so fucking underground in places where they don't see anyone but other strange white people. They were so fucking odd. If it is any consulation being forty years old, overweight and picking on boys who are twenty years old is probably a bad place to be at when you an older adult especially working as a lab assistant or monitor. The girl in my opinion was ugly, she had freckles and those were not pretty in my opinion maybe it was because she basically was just dragging this guy on false pretenses to do him great harm and I thought of her as a witch and she did look like one. Ardently she was ugly inside and out and whilst they spoke about that student who was asking about a calculus tutor to the girl as her being a lab assistant; it was fucked up I thought to myself. He is going to ask one day and end up like Emmet Till. That is what I thought. It was a moment of dread and well these two asshats could never feel anything but envy for normalcy. The girl thought I was eyeing her another day in the lab. I was actual restraining myself from saying anything to the person and her trifling ways. I don't know how I looked but this person thought I was checking her out. But this guy who was actually smart probably never heard from her on her serious deception. I never seen such in my life of people being so doublesome and doublesided and it so freaking nauseating that guy basically walked everyday into a trap and any closer would be framed in a fucking nightmare. Oh, one in which dear husband to be is "permitted" to think and I say permitted to think he must shot this guy because he is messing with his to be wife. Sick shit but that was that community college and its women and it was not only me apparently.
I paint this large picture to tell you that you never have to apologize, hide who you are or be fake friendly with people when they are for you and with you and not against you. True and true.
Yes, I am to tell you that I never went out of my way to get involved and tell that guy to not be bothered with the girl but I frankly could not take anymore hits from that place and every time I would even be out-I would take a fucking hit and it-the hit was from unwanted attention. The doublesome in its full intrigue;racism in pure if not highschool blown over drama from a backstabbing "friend" and her chatty mystical rumor mill ways to incite racial horror.
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