It all goes to shit.

    Yea, this year has been a year completely void of women and I am thankful. I find better respect from people who are nude models than the type of puritan sort than hates them and yet posts a twerk video. Have come to the conclusion I don't need anyone to complete my meaning and even give me any more meaning and even be a person who contributes anything to my life. Should not be forced to carry out a role in which really is the antithesis of adventure, progress and just being able to live a damned good life as a creator. When I went to college, I felt some need to parry into these ideas of having to stand for a stymied and forced nature of romantic equation. That you have to do these things to be apart of society and the crowd but really you don't. You just really have to find people who are good people and ones you aren't using as an object and they aren't doing as such but treating you as you should be treated. I am to say there have been times greatly since college where I have felt like I have been bulldozed by these notions of that "there is a pairing for you in college" just to get devils in return and devils that do the bulldozing.

    I am to recognize that in the past several of my creative efforts were just threatened, held under water, the mood and the atmosphere just muddied by "devils that do the bulldozing" these people who rip away the iconic dreams, promoters of dorms and university say exist and they do so because they realize these iconic dreams are an archetype of some corporate success story to them and just like trash want to rebel against everything potential good in these dreams which are just subverted elements of real reality. They want to deny certain people the feeling of any of these real realities. Being loved, support and liked for who you truly are and not what people want to make believe about. 

     I had to fight head to toe with many of these "devils" and really they could have even been friendly but when the going gets tough-they just turn on you to say their rebellion against good ideas is justified. Good ideas which they should know are subverted but they ignore that to just blame it all for ever existing. Maybe is the thesis of the toxic feminists and the incels but yes more importantly the feminists as I am speaking about bad women here. Yet foot for nail, I have had to fight against people I never should have had simply because they lacked decency, common sense and anything good in their hearts. No time was such a brutal time as spring 2016 but then even so more the summer and then fall 2016. There was some solace after spring 2017. There were really no women in summer 2017 and fall 2017 that I really had a contact with and if anyone became negative during these times they would not until later and it was not a whole boat full of people. Things minorly went off the ramps in winter/spring 2018 and it was quiet in the summer 2018. Yet when I got to fall 2018, the beast of the convoluted hatred vested in "devils" just appeared over and over again. Its like the whole system expects a false narrative of a truth upon a public and yet bad people and those particular rebels against this idea take it too far to where they are attacking the very notion of any good outcomes with emboldened racism and self hatred to boot.

     Winter and Spring 2019, was just where it all fucked over. It had some good moments but always they were burdened by all the bad actors that really it would not have been so hard for them to act right. But yet they choose to believe their acts were cool and yea, let's shit over people's works and basically indulge we have some superiority when no one thinks anything is a competition. Yet people are posed to be anal by their futile dispositions against the truth and against reality. I eventually am to say you get tired of defending yourself and your works and just want to be alone. Really much after spring 2019, which will conclude soon in my tales; there is nothing else. Maybe some people appear and stuff like that but its never anything good or just a missed opportunity. Slowly over time and getting into this year; it just all falls over. It just ends. Every opportunity to be apart of stymied system that was plagued by devils and advertisers trying to capitalize on children becoming sexual mature was just gone. It was just gone and then I realized it. Nothing about that system was real at all. The only thing, I realized, the only thing that worked to even get anywhere was to embrace the real world meanings of the ideas. Those ideas of togetherness and people growing together and having productive lives I realized can only come from people who make the effort to communicate well and appropriately. They respect other people and their dreams in life and don't force theirselves upon others. Everything went right when I did this I realize. Actually reach people in the way people should be reached and not in an advertisement way than pawns their private parts because this is truth nature. I realized that picking the right people to communicate is also vital. You cannot bridge the gaps between people when they have lesser morals and less understanding of what ambitions they can accomplished. It does not matter the race or the class, you just cannot be with people who have no morals and lack of ambitions that they will just about do everything and with a bad moral compass destroy much even theirselves.

    So many broken dreams come out of education. So many. So many people die in college and its sad but no one gives a fuck. I thought I owed it just to stay away from anything that would put me back into the same clutches of the many predatory devils. Sure, you can sit in a class with a bunch of flowery fucking women but when it comes for them to respect you; there is nothing but the recognition of you as an animal and not a person. I never wanted to be were I was starting in fall 2013, spring 2016, fall 2016, winter/spring 2017 again. Because people who are evil simply don't give a fuck about you have a life and a self. The universities and education centers do nothing but encourage their assaults' when you try to even be you. Frankly I was done being picked on. Simply had to hold the line and frankly stay away from women just so I could have a peace of mind and fucking real life of peace and doing things without fear or the fear of retribution. I realize now after months of not seeing nearly any women at all( albeit some in the local park but who cares) that really when people are threatened-the actual people who suffer the most and even die, they never go so far to mock the other side when they are lucky to survive. Maybe Martin Luther King Jr. should have researched on assassination techniques and how he could have been assassinated to stay the fuck away from the window and the balcony or any window where ever he was staying. He should have done this instead of having a resolve that was basically one in where he wanted to give up his life as martyr. Why I compare anything to what I have been doing to this great civil rights leader? Simply because I have faced so much fucking racism and hatred for ever just existing and seriously its uncalled for and just terrible. 

    Some people literally don't know who they are even fucking speaking to. "racism is okay" one could mutter thinking there would be nothing to come out of them saying that. But yet don't know how badly it has affected you and how many of these people carrying these ideas-"devils" and others just contribute to make achieving your dreams even harder. These people and mostly "devils" with racist idealisms seek to kill the you that functions to create your dreams. They are funded by the universities and their banters of a "free for all fuck for all those who are getting a higher education and older or at 18". Like seriously, do we actually shame the people for having a std or aids? No, we-the well meaning people don't because the psychological harm is so fucking great to people shamed for these diseases that it just contributes to the spread of the diseases. When people don't want to be detected and even be informed on what they could do for their health because its such a stigma to have the diseases. They rather continue on like normal. May people continue on as if education is some natural system. Its not; its the antithesis of a hello-it is a bye for many. Bye to their true selves and their ambitions scythed by "devils" who want property and not people with dreams attached or someone just to lash out their rage or their fake love and just lust towards.

     I am to say I have stayed away from women completely because really some people are just used by theirselves and their messed egos and ideas to damage theirselves and are just funded by the messages behind educational bodies today. Yea, let us think everything is normal and just go back to class as if Covid does not exist! Yea, just to continue the sale of youths to a system that cheats them of decency, right and their selves to their fullest potential. You aren't going to be all the best you can be behind a debt from a meal ticket, room and board and whatever necessities you have to borrow yet get to live by yourself when you get fucked over. I am to say that really I don't want part in people who honestly are just bound to become "devils", wrap me into contest with "devils", make me fight "devils" or even smell their stench. I don't mean obviously women are bad but that the system has made it easy for the bad women to win and bastardize the good and even kill the good women in some instances. I really am to say that I have had to fight so hard against some people and whole group of malicious folks just to continue my life and would not jump into that shit ever again willing or at all again. I stay away from the windows because that is what survival is to be. Don't need some shady person shitting on my work to a bunch of racists that could be inspired to do me actual harm. Do not need people shuttering support because they dare see my work which enlightens their cavewomen ass! Don't need public harassments or threats of violence. I put my fucking foot down and said no more and this is why LadyQuest even exist because I refuse to accept such a terrible way of living as just "taking up with people's bullshit".

    Yea, people talked the talk they did in the past. But they will never walk it again in their heads. They will never attempt to do it again when people know what shit they were planning. What vile things swirled in their heads and just ugly they were. The Lady Quest story was fun really much at the start but it became real work when I realized I could not just write," another tale". It became work to which I wanted a good story. A great one. Something real and what could be felt which is why I have taken time off to get ready for a take off of a conclusion and surely it begins here, after this post for when I describe the whole climax of what would be the story of my romantic encounters maybe since fall 2013. We get to a point where you realize, "nothing with ever get better following a system of devils".

    Hoping that you are going to be just accepted by people for what opportunities the university wants to sprout are there in equal opportunity. It just not to work like that without any effort but it would be only human to make short work out of a complicated matter. Yet; people need to do the hard work. Treat people well, communicate to them and give decency to them being them. People need to do the "heart work". That it is it; what I eventually discovered from this pinnacle. Because really I realized the brutal truth about someone I liked. I thought they were this dream girl that picked up me up but really they were nothing but just a devil that loved the nonsense it was fed from the university, bad culture and bad religion....