Dream Girl appeared out of the blue and then I was shook, dream did not come true. No longer the dream girl you are. Just some distant star, lost my plasma car and stranded on earth. I digging my dirt, the dearth for a new dream.

     Near the later bit of March I believe it was then; was when I started to see the person I deemed the dream girl again. She was suddenly at the gates of the music building that led to the area which was nearest the performing arts building and the back alleys of the school where cars would pass. There was a tall table in that music building and it had some tall chairs to go with it. I sat down one day and then another but not for the dream girl at all. But for the fact; to work on my projects and secret ones too( ones I don't post on this site). I had come there in the fall 2018 to do the projects. It was there something of a spark began and I was zealous to chase after it. One day as I was leaving and I had noticed that she-the dream girl was commonly around the area at the time I sat at the tables; she came out of a room conjoing and said hello to me. I said hello back. She asked how I was doing. I said I was doing fine. She left for the day. But the mytsicism of her encounter held me. How did she occur? I thought, she was some phemenom who was in hiding and only appeared once in a while like a shooting star in the night sky. I looked to the room she came from and it was a hall that lead to different rooms. That is to say I felt there was some mysticism in that place. This place had produced this valuable sight of a person, I thought to myself. She must work here, I thought. And really much folks, this goes to illustrate how enamored with the concept of this person being as they were to me when they greeted me; a nice person I could have a chance with. They weren't perfect I realize but no one is, I then told myself. Frankly, this was like a meeting with Santa and you thought it be best to find out where Santa came from.

    Another time I saw her with another dude who was younger than me. I was suddenly jealous. I was out in the tree filled fields between the music building and the perfoming arts building. I just paused myself for a minute. This dream girl was their own person and very much they could hang out with whoever they wanted. I just went somewhere else that day. I am to say that one can be devious if they wanted to. The next time I appeared to see them together at a table. I of course did ignore them. The next time, I just decided that really much; I had no clue who this guy was and was too permissive to laying low for the niceities of protecting other dude's chances. I really did not want this twerp to have a chance at anything more. So one day I approached the tall tables. It was pretty much before I would go there but somewhat at time before the pyschology class. Riverting it was. I asked them if I could sit down. The girl said yea. The dude I guess shrugged and said yea. 

"What is your name?" said the dreamgirl. I told her my name. 

She introduced herself and the dude.

   The girl was puzzled and said the name. I am to say now its probably not a good thing if people have to feel like they are troubled with some jaggled in their mouths when they say your name. She said, " (my name)?". I had to explain its meaning. And the dude was like cool or something. I upped my game as they said and sat straighter up. I would not be deposed by this due.

" What instrument do you play?" dream girl asked me.

" ...." I said.

" Are you a music student?" she asked frazzled.

" No, I actually don't really play instruments but I know how to play a keyboard and guitar", I said. In real life, I can play a piano and guitar but let's say that is something that is development.

" I can sing " the girl said.

I smiled. The dude also smiled but I was not paying attention to him.

" I also play guitar", the girl said.

" wow," I said actually impressed, " do they teach you that".

" in our music program you have different tracks and I am practicing in the Guitar track. I'll graduate soon", she said, " our program is really self driven, you hear those people singing; we have the most self driven people here. They practice alone in that room. You often hear people praticing for their class assignments and finals". I really was intrigued about the whole music program.

" do you know an african dude?" she asked," he is often here".

"hmm, I might have seen him-he was loud and he sung all these different songs while he was here", I said. I really am to say the guy reminded me of those band kids from highschool. A bit too active in playing the fool but then again I really did not know the person. 

" His name is ( his name) and he is very creative. He has a good vocal range and one of our best students", She said.

" Cool, that's good" I said," he did sing alot".

If you followed this same story from the start to now, you should know this same guy was the one who was speaking with Andrea at the end of the semester. I really have no opinion on the dude and no real hostility at all but let's day the dream girl was a good friend of his-nothing more.

Of course, I had to be nice to tthe other guy who was more naive and younger than me. " what is your major? are you a music student." I asked him. 

" No, I am taking my basics" he said.

" is it chemical engineering you want to transfer for", the dream girl said.

I really hated questions begin directed to this guy and the way he said things was very pretentious and sticky with self repression. Some parent to this guy or his parents were making him go into this field.

" yea" the guy laughed and the dream girl laughed back.

" you should know this", I believe he said.

" Sorry, I was questoning what your major was", she said

"What is your major?" the woman said to me and her eyes were so attentive and so attractive but also so sharp. I had to catch myself from being in gaze of her beauty of course and said, " um, well, I majored in graphic design, I actually graduated from this school just hear to get more credits to transfer".

"Oh, what is graphic design?" the dream girl asked.

It always puzzles me how people don't know what graphic design is. I am to say even ancient romans had it for a snack counter that was unearthed completely yesterday.

" isn't that where you design things" said the clueless naive dude.

" its like what is on a soda bottle, the design" I said," I basically-graphic designers make the outlooks of things".

"Oh" she said, " so this bottle's outlook" 

She held up a drink she had.

" yea," I said, " I actually have business cards from the program when I was here" 

" cool" she said.

" cool" the dude said.

" would you guys like them?" I said.

" yea" the woman said.

" um sure" the guy said relucantly.

I gave them the business cards after I took them out of my wallet.

They looked them over.

"this is very nice" the dream girl said.

This made me smile isnide.

"yea, " the dude said," this is very nice, what program did you use?"

"illustrator" I said," the number is wrong, change the 8 to a 9."

  " oh okay" dream girl smiled. I was intending for her to get the message that she could call me.

Then the dude said," the number is wrong, how did that happen?"

I really did not like this dude.

"It happened because I thought my number was some way different that particular day", I said.

"okay," dream girl said, " its almost 3;00, "

She looked to the other dude.

"is it?" the dude said and checked his phone for the time, " it is"

"we have to go to class now", the dream girl said, " it was nice talking with you, I'll see you later".

" okay, yea, I have to go to class too" I said,

" what class?" the dream girl asked.

"pyschology" I said.

"Oh, taken that earlier when I first came here, " she said.

" I got to go" the guy said and he left.

" will you be here longer? You're not going to class?" the dream girl said concerned that I was not moving"

"I'll be going in awhile, I have to do something first quickly", I said firmly,

"okay," she said, "bye".

"bye" I said.

   I was really touched she had spoken to me and yet expressed concern for me. I thought to myself and really much I was happy. What actually why I stayed back was to buy something to drink I believe-at least two sodas and then I went to class. I was impressed in myself that I had courage but what else were you to expect?

    It was at this time folks, I did not know what I was getting into but I was happy that in all of the world I had spoken to this woman- I told myself. I would not trade anything for the experience, I thought and yes sadly; this person was just closed off from being a real person in the end. I assume that by this time and probably from the start of when they started coming here that they had a boyfriend from what I currently no. Me in the past knew nothing and frankly I do not stalk people online for anything. Whatever information I came across later was only by chance or maybe by alorightmn.  You frankly add one friend or two friends from the same vicinity; facebook continues to introduce people who have accounts from the same area and if you talked to as many people as I did-you were likely to know them or have seen them before. 

   The really fucked thing I am to say is that; I thought I had a chance and the happiness of thinking you could reach into a future with this "dream girl" would increase every time you logicial thought things would be going into that direction. They say hello to you when they see you ( I realize that was just to be friendly or whatever-its actually hard to tell if they did not feel some way) You get to talk to them about some personal matters and figure out what they are about. You walk them back to their work place and try to ask them out to the movies which I am not going to spoil the story later. They just then after all this build up and which anyone could reasonably know you were interested in them( I know because some disasteful people just did the wrong set of steps to distance theirselves from me when they could have simply been nice and treated people with respect and not be round about things) just blurt commonly that they have a boyfriend and that is just that. "Its just reality mate". I led you on because I have such swagger and such confidence and really don't care if you thought otherwise of my notions. I am to say one comes away from the experience feeling very belittled as if they aren't an equal but just a pawn in the "way things are to be for them" which in reality is a delusion that takes away the notion that people not similar to them even have freewill. I mean some people might be sensitive to that when their whole people's mainly of whatever background have "kinda"( no largely) of been portrayed as lessers especially by a haunty religion. I am to say I was just sad and then I was angry. I thought this person would be different and they weren't passive aggressive and anti social as any other person I met that I thought had potential and just treated me like trash. They choose to ignore they were doing any wrong at all and just took my actions for granted. Like I was just a chance for them to experiment past their "faithful existence". I am to say that really much when you see such a person who really is just there to be faithful and yet thinks otherwise sometimes and says "maybe later" to a movie siting-you can say you come out very bitter. As if you are the 2nd dude and frankly don't matter. And when you walk away sad, they act like, " what did I do wrong?" Not ever realizing any wrong on their part.

   This build up of mine was of hope that came from courage. It paid out to nothing. All it got was the attention of some naive friend that was hanging out with the dream girl on the last week I realized I had been played. And frankly, no one wants to think of another when they were sat upon another. So yea, the whole hopes and dreams I had of any future with this person exploded. Maybe for the best. Honestly, I am to say religious catholic latina types are the antithesis of my whole existence. I am to say there is nothing more stupid nor more fucking sad than a bunch of people being stripped of their culture and then their descendants following a religion which made their lives hell. For a descendant to accept these religions as an absolute truth despite what absolute evil it did to their ancestors-is just self hatred and frankly I cannot get behind that. Those people are also not very forthcoming with their actual beliefs and tendencies and frankly put up a nice face. They also don't believe in creativity as being vital to the human condition or it even being a job in which people and their children can do. Literally, I am to say I don't know all about this person I called a "dream girl" to say all that they are a bad person. Its just that; they already had charactersitics I did not like but choose to overlook for the sake of what I found attractive yet just knowing they would rather trip a person up than rather tell them the truth for their own good and sanity tells me alot about their character. Just a somewhat shallow individual who could learn to be their true self fully and not think they did nothing wrong when they did.

   Its not like I have led people on in my life. Nope. The thing is women time and time again, led me on and they even come up to me and do it too. I am to say this whole explosion of the truth at the end of the semester just got to me at the end even further down the line because brother facebook just does not want you to move on without finding who the person is with by suggesting their profile. I thought the dude from earlier was the competition but frankly when I saw who this woman was dating- I was shook. It crossed my mind, "something is wrong with that person". The dude she was with; was not very attractive let's just say that and just looked old. I am to say that its not someone who you would pair them up with.  But people are entitled to what looks unappealing and frankly to my deeper idealisms are.