8/22/2013
This date was a date in which I wrote Dreams of the Future. Somewhat done with wishing for good things to come as the result of other people but I had hopes that college would be a good time but I was mistakened. I thought that they-the people would be serious about education and that no one would be out to bother me, but I was wrong. So very wrong.
Albeit to say even if I was wrong; the hopes for my future and my goals were never wrong and rather
even will say that the opinions of others do not matter in this tale but it is sad that the world is so corrupt that no matter where you go there are always individuals against you especially in a place of higher education.
However I say that in my actually creations that I was lost in my what to do next and wanted to continue doing experimental storytelling through prompts as I had done earlier that summer. But dead wrong is it to hope that people can add anything to the mystical and magical stories you create. I had already knew from past experiences to not trust people with my works nor ever be serious about it but from a dream perspective I had to be happy and hope that the future held something bright in finally begin able to achieve my dreams as I planned with other individuals.
I cannot tell you how much time I spun trying to find similar individuals but I could not at all. I may have found great fellows but else I never found anyone who had the same drive as me and that is when I realized that in this barbaric illiterate world of art and creation-finding anyone as driven as me to even have a plan at all; is like finding a robo cop in the era of the magna carta. To say I basically was a monk who could read and everyone was just a serif or some other equivalent to a medieval society member of any social class and particularly did not have the skills necessary. While having the interest in art to view and purchase or even look at it; they had no literacy in the actual craft.
And if anyone did have skills I figured they were so different in background of learning and doing that they just did not have the same objective mind. To say more so, I was a black sheep in a world intolerant of dreams.
There was no one who did the amount of preparation that I did nor the amount of work that I did.
No one had 37 written ideals. No one practiced over years to do anything of such delicacy. No one had written in the length of several books. No one ever wrote on a blog in where it actually requires your ideal content. No one had complied a database of their ideals and no one frankly had a plan but just to attend college and that be that. And just let theirselves just be. Had no goals and no thought of their own frankly and never thought truly about the provision of money in how it adheres to your dreams and if you commit to a four year degree that gives you a load of debt and you are never sure of a job after. Do you have time to experiment and be young after four years vs not going to college at a four year university and having time to experiment whilst a job that actually pays and particularly going to a two year university where the debt would never be so high? No one ever questioned these things and concerned theirselves with direct pride.
But I pondered. I would never be chained to forsake advancement and dreams and some people really do not know what a free spirit is and it can never be them-so broken and dull that they cannot even think theirselves, thinking that completing this four year degree merits a badge. And that is all that is there for them in life. It is a joke how broken the youth is. And it surprises me how much gun violence is as there is no prospect for many people to even live their lives. When people adults alike are prosperous in forming evils that ever aspire youth to do bad things and give them opportunities to buy weapons to harm others of their same generation. And for much of which can be said those who are mindless and blindly leap off into the four year school year of college and never consider the toll on person, self and future in terms of commitments- are just those who come with ammunition and without lack of respect to engage others not like them with such cruelty. Engaging in politics and forums and ideals that never ever do anyone nor their generation any good. These people entitled not to think and think they have it all just by doing this one thing that you are assumed to do in the first place without any merits nor motivation either-believe theirselves superior because they never have to think and think they are prized citizens because they believe they never have any trouble concerning the "others".
The others who live such unfortunate lives because they never attend a four year university.
Have to work jobs and do stuff else besides the culture found in a four year university.
The others who live such death lives because of the burden of work.
Those who have no real future because they choose not to embark on education.
It is a joke. Because that is all they hear from the news and think that is the merit system of the world giving them the right to pit anyone they see of these descriptions as inferior. Just because they believe the news to be the merit system in which they as adults will receive merits because they believe it to reflect society and when some news is biased so are the morals of these individuals corrupt and compromised.
These individuals to say nicely are already dead. They have no self goals, no self rights and no self soul and none heart and no compassion from no one that is not apart of their bubble. Their bubble being those from their college and family, whomever they consider their family and it differs from people to people and that representing their heart. But truly; while thinking they are superior to everyone and never having empathy do you see ever these people doing great to our society?
The answer is no. They are akin to be greatly racist even if a minority. They are akin to be selfish and that includes anyone they are going to further meet and have such demands of them that they create a toxic atmosphere and work environment. Whether this be abuse of their future family or coworkers in many malicious manners. They also as I mention never clearly consume to identify with anyone who is also outside their experience so how can they even know of real life culture and the outcomes that come about for people who pursue other routes of life. Do they stay in the closet all their lives and think these people are trash? For many yes, and because of personal connections maybe they experience it but yet that does nothing for them because they close their eyes and minds to it?
They do. As well to be said; make political movements and ideals and decisions that are completely blind to reality regardless if democratic or republician and for gay or not-they do influence good reactions. If anything are just to reflect their campy yet cheesy ideals that no one else but them reflect. And some of these ideals in which they represent tend to represent mental insanity.
I though about all of this concerning what I had known from my life and experience with said college individuals and the reality of their perspective on life and politics and can say from own family; this is frankly true. Yet the morals of said family can be said to actually be influenced to care about those who are not fortunate but yet represent a higher stance that is not realistic to the actuality of reality. In which they are somehow yet better than the individuals they want to represent and seek for.
Yet I never found out how great people desire to just conform to a fake dream of what society means rather than going for their own dreams and how people would rather comfort in the sake of their moralities is truly something that has never happened in previous eras. Here you have ever opportunity to go for your dreams and even like who you want to like and live with them, yet for the sake of being " comfortable" would rather continue to support some fake ideal and give idol the news to some standard society represents and give idol to sensation of what society represents.
You might consider this; the Billboard Awards tries to represent the dream of music and all of which music represents but only supports the most popular artists and most popular genres in which people are in attraction of making money. And yet says it is all about making dreams come true and representing music it excludes so many artists and so much music that it is only what hierarchy wishes to assume that people actually listen to in this era for the sum of money the artists bring in yet some of influence in making money as well. What is also becoming more evident is that they can degrade ideals of dreams, money and inclusion just so they can make money and ever earnest money.
People might say everything about money but it is about being earnestly evil. We all have a choice regardless of background and some people refuse to take opportunities when given or pursue when dealt to give or give onto others to pursue because they are comfortable believing society is good and wrong and judge and god himself. And any idol in which they pick to represent society is good and wrong and judge and god himself. But there is none morals in a society in which abstracts to gather and slaughter. And for many education like college is where many people become monsters and the real people are slaughtered, led and guided to place an idol in form of a lifestyle that seeks to degrade life itself and makes college and certain lifestyle vice and if you do not have that you are no one.
And if a college ever makes a motto to help undeserving and impoverished communities they really just want to mindwash them and do wrong by them in which they further destroy them and fund ever terrible activities to control and harm them. Because they never bring out the best as many of their students never contribute to society but become a burden and harden know how to do basic outside society functions. They become trapped in a box that they never escape college really and never truly learn how to do things and keep on adding skills in which someone who never goes to college and not negatively influenced can add on quiet easily. Said as well Billboards will try to represent the strife of minorities or movement can never do so for the facet that it only seeks to profit off of anyone who poor, different or a minority and probably only includes rap and all else just to be inclusive and because such music is now "cultural relevant" and such a cash cow. And only does so just to continue degrade real life problems and movements just so a sum few can be happy they are apart of the world yet not and continue to profit off the movements vital to life for many individuals.
I made a sign and poster called MK MZODERN goes Hardcore featuring some 2000s ish type computer art and remember, I never intended to leave such a weak message at any times or be lenient because of the following as I concluded then; people have the choice to do good but they would rather be comfortable doing wrong. And it is such a shame because in the past people never had the opportunity to reach their goals in such a wide open acceptance to do so and such a variety of options and availability of resources too-yet time after time, you squash it and never choose to do the right message. And I decide that this is certainly the status quo to always relinquish any responsibility to morals and following adhering to any real moral code or respecting any belief. People would rather let idols dictate their lives and no you do not need a private plane to spread gospel when your gospel is cheap. You see; people have become so reliant on these ideals of being able to choose to be good or lenient wrong that when they are in real trouble neither the ideal of doing good or lenient wrong can help them as they are guilty of just being mindless and just wishing society whatever idol they think it means to push them along. And for many it is just whatever crime they think of next and when they are actually caught in whatever their idol has become, maybe it be movies, office of government, politics and college-they have no where to go because they are so damn comfortable and at times become confident in doing wrong. Yet no one speaks of this and wonder why mental insanity and problems in society. Yet I wondered this at this date if not before.
But never would I come to now the spectrum of crazy that lies within that estate of college, government, media and any idol that represents society and especially would experience the insane in particular and it would weigh me down of how incompatible people were to my own dreams and perspective and even being able to respect me as a person and not a thing. Not a thing to hate, and not just a person to fuck. And fuck over. I lay down the hard truth, education being cost at money is the start of a chain of largely unknown corruption and a corruption evolution scale which plagues society and needs to be ended by one thing; decentralization of college education as the source of all worthy education and pursuits and make college free. It strikes me that people only want it to not be free, is because they known that a money run education system of college is just the source to their idol's continued existence and it is the suffering and all the wrong that conveniently fucks over society and unity of humanity for all its worth. In which transferring information outside the eyes of the entitled is wrong. And which convening outside the information of the eyes is wrong. College is the authoritarian in our society that is slowly killing us because it has such corrupt connections due to money and soul of the unkempt insufferable in our world. People smile even when caught because they know their evil continues and we forever support it yet not know how the system is rung and how it fucks over many people.
But really to say on this day I did not know all of this at all in the scale of corruption; the previous ideals before I discovered the crazy where my ideals in which yet to be given any real context but even then I knew them right just did not know if such evils truly existed in real waking life and to say of the fact, reality is crueler than fiction and at this time. I not only struggled with experimenting and what of my plan to further my goals whilst being humane but always with the ideal of staying clean but not really is the ideal of staying clean-can you follow what is in your heart without falling and failing? I decided I would rather die than not follow my heart so to speak and for a world in which has lost any true feeling of gut and balsy this is forever the right act to do....
Albeit to say even if I was wrong; the hopes for my future and my goals were never wrong and rather
even will say that the opinions of others do not matter in this tale but it is sad that the world is so corrupt that no matter where you go there are always individuals against you especially in a place of higher education.
However I say that in my actually creations that I was lost in my what to do next and wanted to continue doing experimental storytelling through prompts as I had done earlier that summer. But dead wrong is it to hope that people can add anything to the mystical and magical stories you create. I had already knew from past experiences to not trust people with my works nor ever be serious about it but from a dream perspective I had to be happy and hope that the future held something bright in finally begin able to achieve my dreams as I planned with other individuals.
I cannot tell you how much time I spun trying to find similar individuals but I could not at all. I may have found great fellows but else I never found anyone who had the same drive as me and that is when I realized that in this barbaric illiterate world of art and creation-finding anyone as driven as me to even have a plan at all; is like finding a robo cop in the era of the magna carta. To say I basically was a monk who could read and everyone was just a serif or some other equivalent to a medieval society member of any social class and particularly did not have the skills necessary. While having the interest in art to view and purchase or even look at it; they had no literacy in the actual craft.
And if anyone did have skills I figured they were so different in background of learning and doing that they just did not have the same objective mind. To say more so, I was a black sheep in a world intolerant of dreams.
There was no one who did the amount of preparation that I did nor the amount of work that I did.
No one had 37 written ideals. No one practiced over years to do anything of such delicacy. No one had written in the length of several books. No one ever wrote on a blog in where it actually requires your ideal content. No one had complied a database of their ideals and no one frankly had a plan but just to attend college and that be that. And just let theirselves just be. Had no goals and no thought of their own frankly and never thought truly about the provision of money in how it adheres to your dreams and if you commit to a four year degree that gives you a load of debt and you are never sure of a job after. Do you have time to experiment and be young after four years vs not going to college at a four year university and having time to experiment whilst a job that actually pays and particularly going to a two year university where the debt would never be so high? No one ever questioned these things and concerned theirselves with direct pride.
But I pondered. I would never be chained to forsake advancement and dreams and some people really do not know what a free spirit is and it can never be them-so broken and dull that they cannot even think theirselves, thinking that completing this four year degree merits a badge. And that is all that is there for them in life. It is a joke how broken the youth is. And it surprises me how much gun violence is as there is no prospect for many people to even live their lives. When people adults alike are prosperous in forming evils that ever aspire youth to do bad things and give them opportunities to buy weapons to harm others of their same generation. And for much of which can be said those who are mindless and blindly leap off into the four year school year of college and never consider the toll on person, self and future in terms of commitments- are just those who come with ammunition and without lack of respect to engage others not like them with such cruelty. Engaging in politics and forums and ideals that never ever do anyone nor their generation any good. These people entitled not to think and think they have it all just by doing this one thing that you are assumed to do in the first place without any merits nor motivation either-believe theirselves superior because they never have to think and think they are prized citizens because they believe they never have any trouble concerning the "others".
The others who live such unfortunate lives because they never attend a four year university.
Have to work jobs and do stuff else besides the culture found in a four year university.
The others who live such death lives because of the burden of work.
Those who have no real future because they choose not to embark on education.
It is a joke. Because that is all they hear from the news and think that is the merit system of the world giving them the right to pit anyone they see of these descriptions as inferior. Just because they believe the news to be the merit system in which they as adults will receive merits because they believe it to reflect society and when some news is biased so are the morals of these individuals corrupt and compromised.
These individuals to say nicely are already dead. They have no self goals, no self rights and no self soul and none heart and no compassion from no one that is not apart of their bubble. Their bubble being those from their college and family, whomever they consider their family and it differs from people to people and that representing their heart. But truly; while thinking they are superior to everyone and never having empathy do you see ever these people doing great to our society?
The answer is no. They are akin to be greatly racist even if a minority. They are akin to be selfish and that includes anyone they are going to further meet and have such demands of them that they create a toxic atmosphere and work environment. Whether this be abuse of their future family or coworkers in many malicious manners. They also as I mention never clearly consume to identify with anyone who is also outside their experience so how can they even know of real life culture and the outcomes that come about for people who pursue other routes of life. Do they stay in the closet all their lives and think these people are trash? For many yes, and because of personal connections maybe they experience it but yet that does nothing for them because they close their eyes and minds to it?
They do. As well to be said; make political movements and ideals and decisions that are completely blind to reality regardless if democratic or republician and for gay or not-they do influence good reactions. If anything are just to reflect their campy yet cheesy ideals that no one else but them reflect. And some of these ideals in which they represent tend to represent mental insanity.
I though about all of this concerning what I had known from my life and experience with said college individuals and the reality of their perspective on life and politics and can say from own family; this is frankly true. Yet the morals of said family can be said to actually be influenced to care about those who are not fortunate but yet represent a higher stance that is not realistic to the actuality of reality. In which they are somehow yet better than the individuals they want to represent and seek for.
Yet I never found out how great people desire to just conform to a fake dream of what society means rather than going for their own dreams and how people would rather comfort in the sake of their moralities is truly something that has never happened in previous eras. Here you have ever opportunity to go for your dreams and even like who you want to like and live with them, yet for the sake of being " comfortable" would rather continue to support some fake ideal and give idol the news to some standard society represents and give idol to sensation of what society represents.
You might consider this; the Billboard Awards tries to represent the dream of music and all of which music represents but only supports the most popular artists and most popular genres in which people are in attraction of making money. And yet says it is all about making dreams come true and representing music it excludes so many artists and so much music that it is only what hierarchy wishes to assume that people actually listen to in this era for the sum of money the artists bring in yet some of influence in making money as well. What is also becoming more evident is that they can degrade ideals of dreams, money and inclusion just so they can make money and ever earnest money.
People might say everything about money but it is about being earnestly evil. We all have a choice regardless of background and some people refuse to take opportunities when given or pursue when dealt to give or give onto others to pursue because they are comfortable believing society is good and wrong and judge and god himself. And any idol in which they pick to represent society is good and wrong and judge and god himself. But there is none morals in a society in which abstracts to gather and slaughter. And for many education like college is where many people become monsters and the real people are slaughtered, led and guided to place an idol in form of a lifestyle that seeks to degrade life itself and makes college and certain lifestyle vice and if you do not have that you are no one.
And if a college ever makes a motto to help undeserving and impoverished communities they really just want to mindwash them and do wrong by them in which they further destroy them and fund ever terrible activities to control and harm them. Because they never bring out the best as many of their students never contribute to society but become a burden and harden know how to do basic outside society functions. They become trapped in a box that they never escape college really and never truly learn how to do things and keep on adding skills in which someone who never goes to college and not negatively influenced can add on quiet easily. Said as well Billboards will try to represent the strife of minorities or movement can never do so for the facet that it only seeks to profit off of anyone who poor, different or a minority and probably only includes rap and all else just to be inclusive and because such music is now "cultural relevant" and such a cash cow. And only does so just to continue degrade real life problems and movements just so a sum few can be happy they are apart of the world yet not and continue to profit off the movements vital to life for many individuals.
I made a sign and poster called MK MZODERN goes Hardcore featuring some 2000s ish type computer art and remember, I never intended to leave such a weak message at any times or be lenient because of the following as I concluded then; people have the choice to do good but they would rather be comfortable doing wrong. And it is such a shame because in the past people never had the opportunity to reach their goals in such a wide open acceptance to do so and such a variety of options and availability of resources too-yet time after time, you squash it and never choose to do the right message. And I decide that this is certainly the status quo to always relinquish any responsibility to morals and following adhering to any real moral code or respecting any belief. People would rather let idols dictate their lives and no you do not need a private plane to spread gospel when your gospel is cheap. You see; people have become so reliant on these ideals of being able to choose to be good or lenient wrong that when they are in real trouble neither the ideal of doing good or lenient wrong can help them as they are guilty of just being mindless and just wishing society whatever idol they think it means to push them along. And for many it is just whatever crime they think of next and when they are actually caught in whatever their idol has become, maybe it be movies, office of government, politics and college-they have no where to go because they are so damn comfortable and at times become confident in doing wrong. Yet no one speaks of this and wonder why mental insanity and problems in society. Yet I wondered this at this date if not before.
But never would I come to now the spectrum of crazy that lies within that estate of college, government, media and any idol that represents society and especially would experience the insane in particular and it would weigh me down of how incompatible people were to my own dreams and perspective and even being able to respect me as a person and not a thing. Not a thing to hate, and not just a person to fuck. And fuck over. I lay down the hard truth, education being cost at money is the start of a chain of largely unknown corruption and a corruption evolution scale which plagues society and needs to be ended by one thing; decentralization of college education as the source of all worthy education and pursuits and make college free. It strikes me that people only want it to not be free, is because they known that a money run education system of college is just the source to their idol's continued existence and it is the suffering and all the wrong that conveniently fucks over society and unity of humanity for all its worth. In which transferring information outside the eyes of the entitled is wrong. And which convening outside the information of the eyes is wrong. College is the authoritarian in our society that is slowly killing us because it has such corrupt connections due to money and soul of the unkempt insufferable in our world. People smile even when caught because they know their evil continues and we forever support it yet not know how the system is rung and how it fucks over many people.
But really to say on this day I did not know all of this at all in the scale of corruption; the previous ideals before I discovered the crazy where my ideals in which yet to be given any real context but even then I knew them right just did not know if such evils truly existed in real waking life and to say of the fact, reality is crueler than fiction and at this time. I not only struggled with experimenting and what of my plan to further my goals whilst being humane but always with the ideal of staying clean but not really is the ideal of staying clean-can you follow what is in your heart without falling and failing? I decided I would rather die than not follow my heart so to speak and for a world in which has lost any true feeling of gut and balsy this is forever the right act to do....
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