Wed Nov 9

 So I will be completely and brutally honest with you all. There is only one thing to say about the situation with the two ladies. They were really making my life miserable. I mean, always trying to mean mug you and really much-I don't think anyone notices this but I came from a school where people were pretty aggressive and even violent. If anyone stared at you like these women were they wanted a fight, trouble or to bully you. My case in point is that these two women were not good people. Yet I tried to reason past this instinct in some sort but that is like saying slavery did not exist which it did. A person was literally trying to understand these people when they were speaking to them and really  it was necessary how everyday they pinned me with their stares and making me sweat that one day they would finally pick a fight with me. I mean I was intimidated by these women. When I appeared on the 9th, I really am to tell you that I only spoke to these people to get them off my tail and to stop pinning pressure onto me. A thing some women do is get too much into a person space because they just have hatred for the people and think they can ordain some false story that a person has done them harm by simply existing. I did not go over there because I liked them. No, I went over there to make my life better without them peering at me and making  me sweat on what they could possible do. I am to say I did like one of them earlier in fall 2015 but really, this whole act of being mean eyed just made me just hate them. I mean, that if anyone lost favor with me before all the other disappointments, it was to be that girl.

When I approached, a whole day had gone by. Wednesday, the interactive media class was just the teacher struggling to teach something and trying to depend on the gaming majors, the green haired girl and brown hair dude to help her out in teaching something. It was a whole large thing dealing with markers that would execute an action. I mean, this is to say that the teachers at this school were not the most well learned behind their subjects  but at least they fucking taught modern things and not at least put on the right direction of things you should have been learning. There is to be said a person truly wondered what the fuck they were doing in that class. If you did not know it, this was not the best week. Trump was to become President and really much I was sick of my own situation. I could not utter anything again to the green haired girl because I was afraid because of my mood I would say something out of turn.

I was nauseous in that room just listening to the teacher just yap bothersomely about how to achieve some function and then excused herself for a break and then the people helping her commented on how she really did not know what she was doing. The girls at the back who peered at me angrily everyday I went to this interactive design class looked at me and then started chatting in agreement on how the teacher was bad. I mean, the women was nice but really I think that you would likely get a teacher that knew their stuff but at least this teacher was not out for my blood and I rather she not know everything than be a piece of shit like all the other teachers in the graphic design program. The teacher came back and then after not being able to figure something else, just took another break and the girls at the back wanted to leave the class. It was something about their privilege of insisting this that pissed me off. This did not trigger me to talk to them however. It was just when they had the chance they were just staring at me whilst I was trying to draw something on paper. I mean, I was making use of the time given to work on a comic. Likely Dresden Warden most likely but pretty much a Krushre work and not a Kyeombi work.

The teacher came back and told us class was over. The girls later just stayed behind in class as I drew and they kept mean mugging me. It was here that I decided to leave the room in which the green haired girl was still in. I just felt as I could not just continue to sit there even though I was planning on trying to say something to the person but yet these women just got under my skin and I could not resist the impulse that danger was coming my way. I left the room after packing up myself and trying to figure out how to do what the teacher was trying to do. I somewhat got it but then again I did not so easily. It would take three more class periods to learn the thing.

I literally spent the time outside at the back of the school. I did not want to sit at the front of the school where all the couples were because this girl I liked in fall 2015 which I will call Rain Girl had now a boyfriend. I did not want to be nearest that all. I just had missed an opportunity but who knew what shit what have actually happened if I actually had asked her out with the rumor mill that Anna was running and just her attempts to be a piece of utter shit. I am to say that really much there are some people you cannot be with because you can never be strong enough to protect them from the troublemakers who are set on making your life hell.

Alas, I spent my time at the back that day, I did not want to be bothered by anyone. I later went into the science building and there was the dude with the braids but this time he would be angry looking at me as if I was banging pots and pans when I was only drawing and just looking around at my surroundings to ensure someone did not come from behind me and try to injure me.

I later went to Classroom Building A and I drew up until was nearing 6 and then I left. I was kinda tired of being at school but yet a person could not walk home and was just stuck there until someone came. I think that is when I went to the Administration building and saw the two girl sitting there. I decided to play diplomacy than just attack people out of the blue. Maybe their faces weren't angry and that was just because they had a bad rest face. 

Me; Hey, can I sit here?

Them: Hey. Hi.

They looked tired but somewhat excited to see me.

The taller girl; You can.

Me; How do you think of the interactive design class?

I asked this to build rapport.

The Tall one spoke as the smaller girl who was around my height was very quiet.

Rachel/ tall one; It was okay.

Kassandra; I like it but.

Rachel; The teacher did not know what she was doing, I try so hard to stay focus in that class.

Kassandra: but she goes on tangents in that class so much.

Me; Yea, that is true, what are  you guys working on for your final projects?

Kassandra; I have not started.

Rachel: Me neither, have you?

Me; I am thinking of an interactive comic.

Rachel: that's cool.

Her face was just looking kind and the girl nearest me looked as if she was blushing or looking at me in an admiring pose. I think that really I kept away from the idea that the girl liked me because really this person was just gone from my favor. You can say that a person could mean mug to attain status in the problematic atmosphere of the graphic design program but really a person was not just going to ignore all that. I really liked this girl's appearance let me say that. I think that I would like to marry someone who looked like her but really much I was done. I was not going to fall for a trap but yet the emotion in her face kept coming until she said the following.

Kassandra; Yea, that is awesome. we really need to start our projects.

Rachel: yea.

Me: what are your names? 

I had realized I had not asked their names.

Rachel; Rachel

Kassandra; Kassandra.

Rachel; Did you go on that field trip to the design shop in fall 201?

Me; Yea.

Kassandra; That is where I remembered you from.

I was starting to get the notion that this Kassandra woman actually liked me. Yet whilst I wanted previously and maybe then to try to use this opportunity to connect with her, I refused to do so.

Rachel was really smiling at me as well but really I think that I was not going to fall into the trap.

Me; So where are you guys in your education? Like, are you guys about to graduate?

I kept away from the question of why they were looking at me but just tried to figure how much longer would they be at the campus.

Rachel: I am about to graduate. I am a senior in the program and I think I have one semester left.

Kassandra looks to Rachel; ...

Rachel; Kassandra has about one or two semesters left.

Rachel looks to Kassandra.

Kassandra smiled proud, " I actually have to take one or two more classes in the spring and then I will be done, how about you?"

This was the first time she asked a question and was not letting Rachel take the lead.

Me; Maybe two more semesters.

( It would actually take three semesters to actually graduate from this community college with an associates in graphic design).

Rachel: when did you start?

Me; Fall 2015, you guys?

Rachel; Fall 2014, I think for me, Kassandra?

Kassandra looked to her friend and then me; Maybe the spring 2015, I am one semester behind I think.

Rachel checked her phone; well we got to be going somewhere, we will see you again.

I liked how Rachel spoke for the both of them and these people were very interconnected. Rachel got up and Kassandra followed.

Kassandra; Bye.

Rachel; Bye.

They started to walk away.

Me; Bye.

I mention not that this was literally when the day was over and no one were in the buildings much except the science building maybe and some classes in the Classroom Building A. It was night and there one class going on across from us in the usual class we usually had together in the morning. Yet, it was very eerie this day and pretty much any day after the lights in the sky went out and the night pushed in. I mean there are some places you should not go in the school. But after talking to these two women, I went over the library connected to the administration building and took the stairs down. Even though I spoke to those women it felt like a fever dream and I really did not want to speak to them and I was ultimately a shy person who thought of the best for others and ensuring I did not cause any damage to them for those who would be linking off of me to attack them ( people like Anna). Yet why I spoke to these people and not to the Rain Girl, a person I actually liked was because what? They were just people making it so hard for me to live in peace. I had to go and confront them just to get them off my back and them being nice did not really phase me or just get me to drop my guard. I was just glad they would just look bad if they were to look at me angry in class again and well folks they never did.

But I was depressed and I sat on the benches in the dark waiting for my ride home. The dark covered me as a blanket as I mellowed and murmured thoughts to myself. I was depressed really. Here, I talked to a girl in which a year ago I would have been crazy over but yet really much she was just another obstacle. I really did not care that I had spoken to them at all but I had spoken for peace. This was a great victory for a time. I subverted something that was truly venomous into something positive.

I later just got creeped out and afraid of being attacked in the dark that I went across the bridge into the main building and waited at the front.