MM5 intro.
Oh, I was so fucking tired of living in the manner of working on alot of things and not any of the ideas succeeding. This was after the Summer 2016. After I in the spring did a lot of work and entered in two contest from the spring and the summer. The first contest in spring, there was no reply really much and just, " fuck you!". Okay, so yea, let's try to do both an original effort to make alot of works with an exclusive method and enter a south Korean comic book company's contest to become one of their published comics. Sounds promising. Nope, after a summer of giving it all in your own works and a contest of a Lezhin comics, you basically are promised nothing in August. Another, " fuck you" occurred. Try to say much about a stamina of continuing was not willing to push yourself when after this point-you were going to be in a bleak and dismal situation of mind and space even if you did continue the previous summer works not in the competition. That way of life was not working out and so one would take time to give time to these works and for the situation to change for the better. Of you not being tired. However it was asking the world that was not kind or rather parties of people to give you a break and they never would. I remember so sharply in my memory, the entitlement of people thinking they had the ability to poke at the merit of character or its worth.
That only was driven worse by even worse entitlement in the family grounds and just identities of idiocracy. There had been some time in which I truly could have changed everything and that was to continue on forward into a suicidal plight just to continue works and decrease their quality and their means. I was tried and I was not going to push myself. The birthday that was my 21st had to be one of the worst because of this happening looming around and just people continuing to behave in their shitty ways. I started a new direction by an Austin trip and even that was worse than the Birthday. Get to that Sunday where this girl freaking said outloud," I am not interested in him" after her father asked if she was because she probably was looking at me-I just could not take one more hit. Retreated to a corner of my room slept and then got yelled at because I dare stand for myself. The next day a Monday, when I went to school. It was just hell. The people were all so caught up in their poverty of character lifestyles where they try to not work for anything at all and I mean that literally. One would continue to try and draw more to gain ground in a new direction to do things and it was very hard doing so by all the mean stares and entitled comments of frivolous people. I made the first MM 1 magazine. Yea, I did and that changed everything. However in actuality there should have been two more works built to lead into that even. Works done earlier in 2016. But I wanted a completely new direction. I embarked in new methods. That weekend worked on Technogothica and then a new Mindgames. What was wrong with the effort this time. Oh, I paid too much attention to money and the Lezhin contest again. I thought if I tried again, I could get back on the horse but no. Really enough Lezhin is not worth your blood nor tears. Another week passes of just hatred and stares ever the more and really try to move around alot to avoid fighting anyone. Because let's say-you don't go out in public and mean stare people and then not ask, " what the fuck are you doing?" I moved around for the sake of not causing verbal conflicts which could lead into physical conflicts and yes these red eyed fuckers were someone's children and maybe they thought they had such a red eyed privilege because no one spoke back to them before. Yeph, pretty much it. That Friday, after mixing drinks(two flavors of soda despite being of drinking age or rather I did not drink and don't to this day that much) tried out a third chapter for the Mindgames comic that would be adapted. Somewhat it went wrong in ideals but then again was too tried to properly communicate the idea. I realized that I just need to write what I was feeling. Did not give space to that. I passed out in the chair. Both the times of learning that I did not win the Lezhin contest at the beginning of August and then that day I sat in the corner of my room where the lowest points and this was one too. It felt as if I was sinking. You are hopeful for the future and the next week and really much the neonazi regime of modern higheducation and its boon logs of disordered and insane girls all just sum one mental attack and then your mind is messed up. The very engine of getting to a to b is messed up and you have to improvise and repair. You make tons of different methods, works and ideas and just styles and really survive it all by passing all the classes that semester. Made wonderful strides to survive but what about the mind? Oh that Christmas, it becomes the resolve to get back the mind and set things right and that is what the story became.
At this time I am back to where I was that summer 2016 really much as that is where the mind was upended. But its solely has been up to me to try to move past that time to no avail in other projects and ideas yet they have all lacked what I was doing in summer 2016. That was doing many works I deemed the future of my craft alongside older works...in the following magazines will continue the adventure of that. And tell of the advents from August 2016 when I gave the world a chance namely in this MM 5 issue and then a bad birthday and then more things to come and go in that August to this April 19, 2020.
That only was driven worse by even worse entitlement in the family grounds and just identities of idiocracy. There had been some time in which I truly could have changed everything and that was to continue on forward into a suicidal plight just to continue works and decrease their quality and their means. I was tried and I was not going to push myself. The birthday that was my 21st had to be one of the worst because of this happening looming around and just people continuing to behave in their shitty ways. I started a new direction by an Austin trip and even that was worse than the Birthday. Get to that Sunday where this girl freaking said outloud," I am not interested in him" after her father asked if she was because she probably was looking at me-I just could not take one more hit. Retreated to a corner of my room slept and then got yelled at because I dare stand for myself. The next day a Monday, when I went to school. It was just hell. The people were all so caught up in their poverty of character lifestyles where they try to not work for anything at all and I mean that literally. One would continue to try and draw more to gain ground in a new direction to do things and it was very hard doing so by all the mean stares and entitled comments of frivolous people. I made the first MM 1 magazine. Yea, I did and that changed everything. However in actuality there should have been two more works built to lead into that even. Works done earlier in 2016. But I wanted a completely new direction. I embarked in new methods. That weekend worked on Technogothica and then a new Mindgames. What was wrong with the effort this time. Oh, I paid too much attention to money and the Lezhin contest again. I thought if I tried again, I could get back on the horse but no. Really enough Lezhin is not worth your blood nor tears. Another week passes of just hatred and stares ever the more and really try to move around alot to avoid fighting anyone. Because let's say-you don't go out in public and mean stare people and then not ask, " what the fuck are you doing?" I moved around for the sake of not causing verbal conflicts which could lead into physical conflicts and yes these red eyed fuckers were someone's children and maybe they thought they had such a red eyed privilege because no one spoke back to them before. Yeph, pretty much it. That Friday, after mixing drinks(two flavors of soda despite being of drinking age or rather I did not drink and don't to this day that much) tried out a third chapter for the Mindgames comic that would be adapted. Somewhat it went wrong in ideals but then again was too tried to properly communicate the idea. I realized that I just need to write what I was feeling. Did not give space to that. I passed out in the chair. Both the times of learning that I did not win the Lezhin contest at the beginning of August and then that day I sat in the corner of my room where the lowest points and this was one too. It felt as if I was sinking. You are hopeful for the future and the next week and really much the neonazi regime of modern higheducation and its boon logs of disordered and insane girls all just sum one mental attack and then your mind is messed up. The very engine of getting to a to b is messed up and you have to improvise and repair. You make tons of different methods, works and ideas and just styles and really survive it all by passing all the classes that semester. Made wonderful strides to survive but what about the mind? Oh that Christmas, it becomes the resolve to get back the mind and set things right and that is what the story became.
At this time I am back to where I was that summer 2016 really much as that is where the mind was upended. But its solely has been up to me to try to move past that time to no avail in other projects and ideas yet they have all lacked what I was doing in summer 2016. That was doing many works I deemed the future of my craft alongside older works...in the following magazines will continue the adventure of that. And tell of the advents from August 2016 when I gave the world a chance namely in this MM 5 issue and then a bad birthday and then more things to come and go in that August to this April 19, 2020.
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