torture 43.
the pain of coming back and realizing that you are too sick of everything to do anything at all and collapse in nerve racking pain. You cannot survive here, you cannot and frankly there is something better you could be doing with your time.
You go and devote yourself to classes and this and that and you become the explain of how people do not care about other's humanity and who they actually are and just plan to get you out just because of your physical appearance and who you pertain to be to them and what is worse is that you have no plans for them but they have plans for you. Sending these subliminal what if messages and sort.
The rainy days were not the same. This one girl looked on with true ambition, I realized how deeply screwed up this place was and then this other girl from before looked on with desperate ambition. Such temptation of mine became evident. But was it fair when before; I had something that was pure and was real that only got furthered but not like this.
I usually do get sexually frustrated but I usually mediated at that pond to get it all away and then I went back and slowly more interests would build up and I would only stare back to the trues and know that I had to stay away.
One day I painted in colored pencil. That was the Life of Balloon and then I went and saw the girl who always wanted the deed. But I was feeling dizzy the moment I turned the corner and then I started to walk slanted. She smiled at me and I started to freeze and hyperventilate when she looked at me. I went into the door. I went into the room and went to bed early. Enough was enough.
I could keep going but I never met a resolution, each attempt only brought an attempted assassination. And finally I saw the light; should ever people be forced into such relations without proper time to get into them or not? I must escape or everything would be ruined and frankly I had no clear understanding of this place. But the torture did not end here.
You go and devote yourself to classes and this and that and you become the explain of how people do not care about other's humanity and who they actually are and just plan to get you out just because of your physical appearance and who you pertain to be to them and what is worse is that you have no plans for them but they have plans for you. Sending these subliminal what if messages and sort.
The rainy days were not the same. This one girl looked on with true ambition, I realized how deeply screwed up this place was and then this other girl from before looked on with desperate ambition. Such temptation of mine became evident. But was it fair when before; I had something that was pure and was real that only got furthered but not like this.
I usually do get sexually frustrated but I usually mediated at that pond to get it all away and then I went back and slowly more interests would build up and I would only stare back to the trues and know that I had to stay away.
One day I painted in colored pencil. That was the Life of Balloon and then I went and saw the girl who always wanted the deed. But I was feeling dizzy the moment I turned the corner and then I started to walk slanted. She smiled at me and I started to freeze and hyperventilate when she looked at me. I went into the door. I went into the room and went to bed early. Enough was enough.
I could keep going but I never met a resolution, each attempt only brought an attempted assassination. And finally I saw the light; should ever people be forced into such relations without proper time to get into them or not? I must escape or everything would be ruined and frankly I had no clear understanding of this place. But the torture did not end here.
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