The teacher.
I often don't feel as if I ever dedicated a post to the dear teacher of the first english class I ever took in college. Oh, wait because I am busy and most of all running several different tasks even writing on the same subject while doing different tasks is not the same as being able to spend some type talking about particular people who often get overshadowed by their role in the story and no one ever gets to see the othersides of them or their true 3-D image.
Some could relate a romantic of 20th century style of writing to the character of the english teacher. Often to say the woman was seemingly caught between two worlds and maybe that the education system is just as fucked up when this woman just tries to teach as she has been taught herself and not actually teach as if she is the teacher. That becomes clear the first day I sat down in that class. There were alot of emotions. I was excited at first and yet a bit envious and yet ready to challenge. But really the people except for one girl I found where all just cold people and in this inhumane tone of world that no one wants to ever touch just being near people. To say that all the other people in that class were scum. They were trash. They are trash.
The particulars of these people I could relate to you and you would understand them but really let us save that for another rewrite, okay. The teacher of course seems to think everyone is just going to get along and reads the room as everyone is this self sufficient ready college student with all temperaments of working well together when they are hardly can sit near each other without weird dark impressions flowing off each other into the other. That to be said not everyone was like that. I would say that only two people were not like that at all. This girl and I. But that is another story.
The teacher seemed to think that she could find someone to pit her pity of not being a prepared teacher on the first day and get the class to hate this person so she could have so respect and yes control in the means of fear of not being this picked on person. Yes often I do not relate that part of the story because it is a condition of the teacher that really could be contained in her bad behavior onto me later on. Yet I never explained why she had such behavior so yes, let's do that.
I often try to find information about the teachers of the college classes afterwards the class. This particular teacher via the little blackboard application found her particular college email. One then is prompted to how her name is odd and maybe your last name is odd and proceed to type her name into Google. This woman had of course a tumblr account. Full of hipster stuff and analogies and frankly denotes that really this person was not so far removed from a 18 year old at all. I used Tumblr and by the manner of her post could just tell that she was just this recently graduated college student that had gotten through college on a writing degree and decided to become a teacher here at this school. Maybe because it was a simple option and maybe because the school was shit and no one could be blamed if you were not a good teacher her and maybe this was a place to get rose water tinted and yes get wet in the sum of teaching and maybe other endeavors. But I say maybe the teacher was not at all like that.
I do say that around the fourth week into this semester( we will get to that) the teacher had this odd glow off of her and made these subtle smiles to this boy who threw the bobs of weird batons like a circus clown. I was trying to be nice to this guy at first but really somethings and some people just got to be dealt with in the perspective of who you see them because really this guy was quiet annoying. Talking to the girl on the first fucking day and did not even ask her out. The jerk. But to say otherwise. He looked blankly ahead at her. She looked at him and then this bitch from the middle school. As if not to meet his direct gaze. And the people-boys and girls around him all seemed to be thinking the same thing-there eyes did not move as the teacher gazed to the girl from the boy. One of the students then clamored about her skin and what she used if she used anything. She thanked them and moved on. It was this girl in some fancy jacket that was like Wolverine's jacket out of the 00s movies. She never said what she used but asked, " does it really look glowing?"
Now many people would say-nothing happened and I do not even know or can confirm anything happened but in ones sight of view that maybe being protective of certain red flags of could be teacher and student sex is all for the best. Because its highly possible that the teacher did bang clown boy. I did not know then that people say that women's skin glow when they have sex; but picked up just from how they looked at each other and the boy look some embarrassed or on the spot and this was a secret he was going to die with. Like the orange mm avatar-he looked crunchy and frazzled.
I wanted to laugh but there were other people who wanted to laugh and yes they were not on my side so I shut up. And like try to assume a defensive position. One to guard my outlook and make me somewhat "an easy target" to be hit on by the teacher for seemingly being a person in the gaze of sleep. That way always the teacher would aid me from these negative feels and looks from people and yes other students. Even they would be sympathetic to me in part even if they were boinkers because they knew the teacher was a young teacher and easily to pin shit on people to make herself look good in front of everyone. I would get constant contact and maybe just be saved from the unknown but to say people-should you have to save yourself from the unknown; that is another story and I would elaborate but later as all the pieces of a story have to fall together for you to even understand.
Say to say that this was the fourth week and the teacher had done what on the first day. Who was the first to get knocked and be her pin? The guy with the pins of course and tossing them. The Hawaiian dancer wannabe~ I shall peg him as. It was no great deal to see that the teacher was one of these people who could not just teach a damn class. Teach the damn class. She just could not do it without finding someone to narrative onto her own feelings of inferiority. Why did I relate the clown boy first~ it is because she is the one who choose to relate these feelings onto him and choose him as a pin.Which could later said turned into something of a sexual relation by the fourth week. The drama unfolded. But that is speculation. And while to say this would seem a unique idea. No, it was not by the first, the 2nd and third there were all talks about the guy being bothered by the teacher. If he would bang the teacher. That the teacher was hot. By the later fourth; talks that if he did bang the teacher but this was when neither of the teacher nor this guy were in class and for a while or least two class periods later he did not come to class. That to be said. It is to be something to be questioned.
As all these talks were by other students. Everyone knows what was happening. No one is a fool. That is why when people come up with the excuse they did not know what they were doing and that their actions are forgivable it is nonsense. Because they knew what they were doing. Knew that their gazey ass behavior and gossiping behavior was not right among other key priority things but kept on doing it. They could recognize the cause and the happening and to tell my friends they knew exactly doing eyeing me as the inferior and had no remorse because they must have been sitting gods. Reviewing all the elements of a story from the viewpoint to be blunt and short; evil.
Maybe to say that on that first day the teacher did so because the guy was talktive and most reachable to a constant source to rely on to guide her threw this class. However to say after she finished picking on the guy and establishing his bitch role she frankly does the thing that all bad teachers do quiet well- got everyone to say some things about them and where they came from. Noticeably some people should notice that when you saw them nearly every day in the hallways in highschool and they don't once mention the name of the highschool they went to when they mention their previous education and just a place in Houston-they are lying and both inaccurate. While the address to my highschool has changed to be one of Houston. It is so far from it. It is a place called Humble. Some people just want to fit so damn in and when I stood up and talked the teacher was like, " what do you mean" to say in her gaze like no one else~ was warm and inviting besides clown boy( in actuality it would be warmth but the type that burns your ass and could be said unwanted attention and maybe abuse). I told them about me and when I got to my highschool. I said it was a place outside of houston. The bitch who refused to say anything about it before started to say shit with the girl with the wolverine jacket when the teacher asked, "what is that?" Or "where is that?" They started to explain to the teacher in their own cliqued way,"its in this place outside of Houston and ....." The rest of it was negative bullshit that demeans the region just so this wolverine jacket girl could get in the teachers pants. "I've been there before I come from a school called Mcarthur."
"yea~there are football games". Then somehow they went off topic about football for the university and the teacher went onto this girl who then said she was going to study graphic design. I rolled my eyes. That school had terrible graphic design and those people in the arts version were just wasting time and money and while they would have a four year degree it frankly would mean nothing for the lack of graphic design they would even learn or pay for. That is not a different story. This girl was the trash that came from the highschool and did not ever once ever say but, " I came from a highschool in Houston" Completely lying to gain face because she knew how bad her school was compared to everyone else and really just a racist hispanic in the works trying to appeal to what superficial imagery she thought was going to make her likable or successful. That itself is a red flag to tell you how venomous the class was. The bitch I seen all that time since 6th grade to highschool-a long time wanted to act brand new just to fit in with people she namely was going to go back home and curse for various sums of fucked up reasons. That is another story.
To say that the teacher went around in a circle to make people talk but some seats were at the front yet for some reason they junted off and two or three people sat there and these girls were the last. The asian girl who would later look to me with elements that I did her wrong and looked as if she wanted to beat me up. I sat on the last rung of the "C". It would be good if someone who went to the last place of education with me would speak up and actually mention else the place we went to. Because I am sure that while it was terrible school at least one of us had fun there-right. Right. That girl did have tons of fun being there and being an asshole over the years.
Off to say the teacher had to make people speak because no one wanted to speak and they were so antisocially bent in the manner people who are too quiet stab people and that is the true manner of how they presented theirselves to say quiet honesty and would act in their "cute" frame of behavior and be just dicks with passive aggressive behavior and any and every opportunity to betray people. This was the majority of the class. The girl that I liked and liked me, the clown boy and Wolverine Jacket hoe were the only people who spoke up. This guy who had a girlfriend that I was friends with spoke up occasionally but this just made the teacher fall into her whole of self pity and pick on people who seemed weak and easy to pick on like the clown boy for being a talker. Me, for just being me I guess. As she found it her duty to be the most rude and allow for people to be so rude after I spoke as if I could not speak without help from them to explain a world that might as well been so far from all the cold heart bitches in that room. And yes; it was and it is so damn far from the cold hearts of these people. Because they will never recognize what it was truly like. And just make it a subject of destitution complete which it was not. Just a place where people choose to do wrong and guess what; this university was the evolved form of that bitch. Many parallels could be drawn from that highschool I went to that university and to say that the teachers there shared plenty characteristics with those ones at the university. Such as the new teacher with the tendency to pick on people syndrome. A teacher often would only allow people to talk as if a person could not talk theirselves least she believed them a peg to rest blame on to garner some type of authority over everyone else who they could not control elsewise with their meager morals and yes skills.
To say that while clown boy might have been the peg for a while; the teacher viewed me as the alternative peg and tried things to see if she could keep control using me as the peg always trying to cut me off in responses. Always telling me to wake up when it was clear to people with the level of sentience they had;I was awake! Sharks these people were. Just sharks because of their gossip that usually mulled the teacher over and just bad comments and their perception in words that told they knew what they were doing. Yet when clown boy stop coming to class who became the full and permanent peg me. The teacher one time would say hello to me and to many people to say would think its a regular hello but it is one of dependence. One of dependence of needing someone to be an inferior just so they can step on. Many girls at that university and dorm used this same tactic. And oft to say that maybe the teacher was just an older girl. And needed comfort in ways that were akin to how people on college campuses do things to try an ease into her adult life. But yet; my friends after the teacher called me out that one time for so called sleeping and dare pull me aside to speak to me. I would not ever want to be situated in that role and while for reasons unknown it would be detrimental to be in this awake and alert state as a person and maybe black individual in that class with roaming eyes and else eyes otherwheres. I would not be this woman's bitch or call to fame to do even do her job properly without feeling this need to self fulfill by making herself the hero and someone else the enemy onto all. Quiet honestly the two weeks after that pull aside incident I was on the fringe and just decided to fuck it and by then October was over and I had created the work called Slayers of Wolve this time on paper.
Yet to say the teacher is just an interesting person in this story because while trying to fit in an adult world has some tendencies of a young adult and a teenager. Often that much is over looked in many of the story or recountings of a tale.
Some could relate a romantic of 20th century style of writing to the character of the english teacher. Often to say the woman was seemingly caught between two worlds and maybe that the education system is just as fucked up when this woman just tries to teach as she has been taught herself and not actually teach as if she is the teacher. That becomes clear the first day I sat down in that class. There were alot of emotions. I was excited at first and yet a bit envious and yet ready to challenge. But really the people except for one girl I found where all just cold people and in this inhumane tone of world that no one wants to ever touch just being near people. To say that all the other people in that class were scum. They were trash. They are trash.
The particulars of these people I could relate to you and you would understand them but really let us save that for another rewrite, okay. The teacher of course seems to think everyone is just going to get along and reads the room as everyone is this self sufficient ready college student with all temperaments of working well together when they are hardly can sit near each other without weird dark impressions flowing off each other into the other. That to be said not everyone was like that. I would say that only two people were not like that at all. This girl and I. But that is another story.
The teacher seemed to think that she could find someone to pit her pity of not being a prepared teacher on the first day and get the class to hate this person so she could have so respect and yes control in the means of fear of not being this picked on person. Yes often I do not relate that part of the story because it is a condition of the teacher that really could be contained in her bad behavior onto me later on. Yet I never explained why she had such behavior so yes, let's do that.
I often try to find information about the teachers of the college classes afterwards the class. This particular teacher via the little blackboard application found her particular college email. One then is prompted to how her name is odd and maybe your last name is odd and proceed to type her name into Google. This woman had of course a tumblr account. Full of hipster stuff and analogies and frankly denotes that really this person was not so far removed from a 18 year old at all. I used Tumblr and by the manner of her post could just tell that she was just this recently graduated college student that had gotten through college on a writing degree and decided to become a teacher here at this school. Maybe because it was a simple option and maybe because the school was shit and no one could be blamed if you were not a good teacher her and maybe this was a place to get rose water tinted and yes get wet in the sum of teaching and maybe other endeavors. But I say maybe the teacher was not at all like that.
I do say that around the fourth week into this semester( we will get to that) the teacher had this odd glow off of her and made these subtle smiles to this boy who threw the bobs of weird batons like a circus clown. I was trying to be nice to this guy at first but really somethings and some people just got to be dealt with in the perspective of who you see them because really this guy was quiet annoying. Talking to the girl on the first fucking day and did not even ask her out. The jerk. But to say otherwise. He looked blankly ahead at her. She looked at him and then this bitch from the middle school. As if not to meet his direct gaze. And the people-boys and girls around him all seemed to be thinking the same thing-there eyes did not move as the teacher gazed to the girl from the boy. One of the students then clamored about her skin and what she used if she used anything. She thanked them and moved on. It was this girl in some fancy jacket that was like Wolverine's jacket out of the 00s movies. She never said what she used but asked, " does it really look glowing?"
Now many people would say-nothing happened and I do not even know or can confirm anything happened but in ones sight of view that maybe being protective of certain red flags of could be teacher and student sex is all for the best. Because its highly possible that the teacher did bang clown boy. I did not know then that people say that women's skin glow when they have sex; but picked up just from how they looked at each other and the boy look some embarrassed or on the spot and this was a secret he was going to die with. Like the orange mm avatar-he looked crunchy and frazzled.
I wanted to laugh but there were other people who wanted to laugh and yes they were not on my side so I shut up. And like try to assume a defensive position. One to guard my outlook and make me somewhat "an easy target" to be hit on by the teacher for seemingly being a person in the gaze of sleep. That way always the teacher would aid me from these negative feels and looks from people and yes other students. Even they would be sympathetic to me in part even if they were boinkers because they knew the teacher was a young teacher and easily to pin shit on people to make herself look good in front of everyone. I would get constant contact and maybe just be saved from the unknown but to say people-should you have to save yourself from the unknown; that is another story and I would elaborate but later as all the pieces of a story have to fall together for you to even understand.
Say to say that this was the fourth week and the teacher had done what on the first day. Who was the first to get knocked and be her pin? The guy with the pins of course and tossing them. The Hawaiian dancer wannabe~ I shall peg him as. It was no great deal to see that the teacher was one of these people who could not just teach a damn class. Teach the damn class. She just could not do it without finding someone to narrative onto her own feelings of inferiority. Why did I relate the clown boy first~ it is because she is the one who choose to relate these feelings onto him and choose him as a pin.Which could later said turned into something of a sexual relation by the fourth week. The drama unfolded. But that is speculation. And while to say this would seem a unique idea. No, it was not by the first, the 2nd and third there were all talks about the guy being bothered by the teacher. If he would bang the teacher. That the teacher was hot. By the later fourth; talks that if he did bang the teacher but this was when neither of the teacher nor this guy were in class and for a while or least two class periods later he did not come to class. That to be said. It is to be something to be questioned.
As all these talks were by other students. Everyone knows what was happening. No one is a fool. That is why when people come up with the excuse they did not know what they were doing and that their actions are forgivable it is nonsense. Because they knew what they were doing. Knew that their gazey ass behavior and gossiping behavior was not right among other key priority things but kept on doing it. They could recognize the cause and the happening and to tell my friends they knew exactly doing eyeing me as the inferior and had no remorse because they must have been sitting gods. Reviewing all the elements of a story from the viewpoint to be blunt and short; evil.
Maybe to say that on that first day the teacher did so because the guy was talktive and most reachable to a constant source to rely on to guide her threw this class. However to say after she finished picking on the guy and establishing his bitch role she frankly does the thing that all bad teachers do quiet well- got everyone to say some things about them and where they came from. Noticeably some people should notice that when you saw them nearly every day in the hallways in highschool and they don't once mention the name of the highschool they went to when they mention their previous education and just a place in Houston-they are lying and both inaccurate. While the address to my highschool has changed to be one of Houston. It is so far from it. It is a place called Humble. Some people just want to fit so damn in and when I stood up and talked the teacher was like, " what do you mean" to say in her gaze like no one else~ was warm and inviting besides clown boy( in actuality it would be warmth but the type that burns your ass and could be said unwanted attention and maybe abuse). I told them about me and when I got to my highschool. I said it was a place outside of houston. The bitch who refused to say anything about it before started to say shit with the girl with the wolverine jacket when the teacher asked, "what is that?" Or "where is that?" They started to explain to the teacher in their own cliqued way,"its in this place outside of Houston and ....." The rest of it was negative bullshit that demeans the region just so this wolverine jacket girl could get in the teachers pants. "I've been there before I come from a school called Mcarthur."
"yea~there are football games". Then somehow they went off topic about football for the university and the teacher went onto this girl who then said she was going to study graphic design. I rolled my eyes. That school had terrible graphic design and those people in the arts version were just wasting time and money and while they would have a four year degree it frankly would mean nothing for the lack of graphic design they would even learn or pay for. That is not a different story. This girl was the trash that came from the highschool and did not ever once ever say but, " I came from a highschool in Houston" Completely lying to gain face because she knew how bad her school was compared to everyone else and really just a racist hispanic in the works trying to appeal to what superficial imagery she thought was going to make her likable or successful. That itself is a red flag to tell you how venomous the class was. The bitch I seen all that time since 6th grade to highschool-a long time wanted to act brand new just to fit in with people she namely was going to go back home and curse for various sums of fucked up reasons. That is another story.
To say that the teacher went around in a circle to make people talk but some seats were at the front yet for some reason they junted off and two or three people sat there and these girls were the last. The asian girl who would later look to me with elements that I did her wrong and looked as if she wanted to beat me up. I sat on the last rung of the "C". It would be good if someone who went to the last place of education with me would speak up and actually mention else the place we went to. Because I am sure that while it was terrible school at least one of us had fun there-right. Right. That girl did have tons of fun being there and being an asshole over the years.
Off to say the teacher had to make people speak because no one wanted to speak and they were so antisocially bent in the manner people who are too quiet stab people and that is the true manner of how they presented theirselves to say quiet honesty and would act in their "cute" frame of behavior and be just dicks with passive aggressive behavior and any and every opportunity to betray people. This was the majority of the class. The girl that I liked and liked me, the clown boy and Wolverine Jacket hoe were the only people who spoke up. This guy who had a girlfriend that I was friends with spoke up occasionally but this just made the teacher fall into her whole of self pity and pick on people who seemed weak and easy to pick on like the clown boy for being a talker. Me, for just being me I guess. As she found it her duty to be the most rude and allow for people to be so rude after I spoke as if I could not speak without help from them to explain a world that might as well been so far from all the cold heart bitches in that room. And yes; it was and it is so damn far from the cold hearts of these people. Because they will never recognize what it was truly like. And just make it a subject of destitution complete which it was not. Just a place where people choose to do wrong and guess what; this university was the evolved form of that bitch. Many parallels could be drawn from that highschool I went to that university and to say that the teachers there shared plenty characteristics with those ones at the university. Such as the new teacher with the tendency to pick on people syndrome. A teacher often would only allow people to talk as if a person could not talk theirselves least she believed them a peg to rest blame on to garner some type of authority over everyone else who they could not control elsewise with their meager morals and yes skills.
To say that while clown boy might have been the peg for a while; the teacher viewed me as the alternative peg and tried things to see if she could keep control using me as the peg always trying to cut me off in responses. Always telling me to wake up when it was clear to people with the level of sentience they had;I was awake! Sharks these people were. Just sharks because of their gossip that usually mulled the teacher over and just bad comments and their perception in words that told they knew what they were doing. Yet when clown boy stop coming to class who became the full and permanent peg me. The teacher one time would say hello to me and to many people to say would think its a regular hello but it is one of dependence. One of dependence of needing someone to be an inferior just so they can step on. Many girls at that university and dorm used this same tactic. And oft to say that maybe the teacher was just an older girl. And needed comfort in ways that were akin to how people on college campuses do things to try an ease into her adult life. But yet; my friends after the teacher called me out that one time for so called sleeping and dare pull me aside to speak to me. I would not ever want to be situated in that role and while for reasons unknown it would be detrimental to be in this awake and alert state as a person and maybe black individual in that class with roaming eyes and else eyes otherwheres. I would not be this woman's bitch or call to fame to do even do her job properly without feeling this need to self fulfill by making herself the hero and someone else the enemy onto all. Quiet honestly the two weeks after that pull aside incident I was on the fringe and just decided to fuck it and by then October was over and I had created the work called Slayers of Wolve this time on paper.
Yet to say the teacher is just an interesting person in this story because while trying to fit in an adult world has some tendencies of a young adult and a teenager. Often that much is over looked in many of the story or recountings of a tale.
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