76er-the timer.

      I really had things going to a good pace in the later March and April time period. I must say so myself. I spent a whole lot of time by myself and ultimately just in this time went back to classes I else am to say a person struggled with being in; aka the history 2 class and the logistics class. These classes were to be run by some of the most run of the mill assumed "white republican" type people. The History 2 professor just singled me out for no reason out of some many people and really much I think that they actually saw theirselves in me but since I was black rebelled against the idea and treated me badly because of this. I think I should have in hindsight reported this because this really got me to not come to class most often and on some days. Imagine being singled out of so many people and frankly by an adult who you are supposed to trust. Yet I was a kid back then and did not understand how discrimination worked and that I was being discriminated against. The logistic class was so boring that I fell asleep. The teacher had favoritism more for the white students and let me tell you it was just like the community college in the future well the graphic design classes that is. I did not like them and the class was just not that great especially coming to the time we had to work on these team projects-that was the worst part of the class aka working with such snobby, stuck up and privileged people alongside a lack of communication that just had me doing three slides and more to ultimately just get replaced by the person who wanted to "manage the project" in a nice dismissive way.

   I had things in such an ease when they weren't even going that great but it was good how I had my own schedule. I would basically only take naps until 6 am to go eat because if you even got there by 7;30 or something nearest the 8 am-there would be alot of people there as well I had classes beginning early so it was best to eat before class began or else you would starve until whatever dinner had stuff to eat. I am saying that the dinners did not always have things to eat but only at certain times. 12 pm was a no go. You went to either dinner and you would just get cereal. Not what you really came for nor were even paying for. So simply eating before 7;30 am was the only way to succeed in not starving for most of the day until like 2;30 pm or 3;30 pm. Its to be said that most of your classes would take place in the time of 9 to 11 am after the first one and then giving you the chance to never but eat cereal because nothing was synchronous to the times people actually had classes. And yea if you had classes from 1;30 pm to 2;30pm and then a class at 4pm, what did that give you? Nothing good for eating because you literally had to eat between 2;30 pm to 4pm and well what if the dinners ran out of food at 3;30pm? And you basically wanted to study for a bit before the other class-and that just goes on for a hour-its to be said that you would be choosing between studying and eating. Often and many times food would run out a 4pm or even at 3;30pm which literally gives you how much time to get there if it takes you a hour to study? Wait, only 30 minutes which even takes away from being early to the 4 pm class. You literally have like 20 minutes to get your food and eat it or even go back to your dorm and drop off a heavy backpack and then return which is not even logical logistically sound. Yes, so when I said I had a schedule that a person did.

    Ultimately, a person really leaned into the pleasure of real college-that is listening to indie music in a room that basically could be considered your own individual "house". The roommate did not come by much until like end of the semester aka April and May and really much was not that much present in the earlier period of this time. I think that really it was a blessing. No dude trying to bang Camile in the room which was the girl I had a crush on and was going to ask out and well that was fucked over. So many things were fucked over. I remember fondly how this dude wanted to say to me something at the end, " this was a good experience, I wish you good luck". Yea, it was good for you but very bad for me. I never wanted to be cucked in the first place, you cunt. I just watched shows I never could at home and really worked on my craft of comics especially when I skipped on the history class because fuck-no one was going to do that aka literally be abused by a racist fuck who had their own issues. Its not my fault you see yourself in me and hate a person because they are black. The fuck. Its to be said that this shit would continue in the community college in spring 2017. Oh, its always the white republican professors doing this shit. No one who is actually self confident being black or even appreciates theirselves being the such is even invited into these spaces or can feel good without people trying to scapegoat them as the problem. Kudos, I also skipped on that class-I wonder the fuck why?

    Looking back, a person realizes something; it was just the downfall of a college ideal. All the so called friends a person had basically abandoned them and yes, I was never invited to eat-I often just found people eating when I decided to go eat and these "were friends"? They weren't. If at all my real friend group was the girl with the bread, the girl with the red hat and their friends even though I did not speak to them because a person was tailed by haters who were out for harm actually. Could it be the couple and their 3rd wheel? The asian sorority people? Some random asian chick and just some nobodies who thought they were somebodies in the social scene of this place? It was a lot of people. I was to be protective and not speak to them but in hindsight it was a mistake to not hang out with these people when you would just see them again at the same community college you would go to.

       I think to the length you could call these people friends is the fact they knew nothing about Camile in actuality of who she was and how she actually behaved and your history with such said person. I 'd like to depict Camile as a person used by the roommate but she choose to sleep with the dude. He did not force her but what I am to say is that the roommate was no friend. He crossed a line and a person tolerated the bullshit. The individuals called Devante, Nadia, Areef and Korede basically 3rd connections to people I originally knew aka friends of friends of friends were not my real friends at all. They just sat with Camile and never blinked to question as to why she was asking, " if you would ever cut your hair?" to me. I mean its pretty obvious. The damn girl wanted to sleep with me but fuck no-there were people who were also 3rd connections to people I knew who also clamored on Katherine in the same woman hating means; just bragged about each of them sleeping with Camile especially this ugly fucking dude called Steven who had to be the most incel looking Big Bang Theory motherfucker of them all. If a person could make it legal to punch someone in the face for how bad he spoke about either Katherine or Camile; people I both liked and had a crush on-they would see justice finally met for all the creepy and nasty things this dude would say about his "women friends" behind their backs. Camile basically had slept with the roommate, these dudes talked as if they did( which who knows) and possibly countless other people. I just am to say that whatever appeal Camile had at the beginning was gone and all I saw her was like one of those horny girls from highschool who would say the same haircut line. The fuck is with these people ultimately thinking people will self express theirselves to become a stereotype or someone they want? The answer is no, I said and that was that. This person was tenacious. Had no concepts of what even was the betrayal of any male friendship that would probably register alarms in other women! I think this person did not care if they slept a dude's roommate who they could only know through him foremost.

     Yes, I believe I was the one to introduce Camile to the roommate because one time she hung out with the movie crew I hung out with most likely to hang out with me as she knew no one else of that group at that time. This dude eventually would come out of the room one of these times she was hanging out with the group and that is how they came to know each other. I think pretty much Camile was just not that great of a person with morals but just a person with a sexual desire that she just did anything she wanted with no morals about it. Why hang out with a dude when you are just going to sleep with his roommate and then try to backspace the whole previous thing as if it did not happen just so you can sleep with the dude who you seconded? Obviously I was not important. I mean; I did not really even know Camile much at all when she slept with my roommate and that just messed any chance I wanted to get to know this person better. This person maybe realizes that the roommate used them but damn maybe they should not have fucked him in the first place if they were so adamant on me. I wanted to ask her, " why me now? Shouldn't I have been the one that you fucked?" But that was not appropriate in front of these people who really were not attached to anything that was prior happening. Some would say it was not appropriate to say to a lady but really much this person had hurt me and really did not care about anything of that matter at all so why should I care about them? They ruined everything and wanted to get back into a position to gain something or some relationship. It was never to work and they weren't that different from most of these women at this campus; they would fuck everything over and try to get back with a person when they instead of deciding to be cordial and want to be with you would rather be people out to get you. Its to be said that historically; this is how things have been. Certain people only want people for sex based on their view of how their race plays into sexual enjoyment but don't give a fuck to how these people actually are and greatly how they are people. They want to hate you and also to fuck you. That is in sum what the trend would be. Camile was just one of the first to get real anal and really dumb about things if not hateful. You think a person would cut their hair to gain the benefit of someone who really cares nothing about how much they harmed a person by leading them on and just hoping in the bed with their roommate above all which is worse than a stranger by the way. Worse when you, the person they even knew introduced them to their roommate. It never should have happened.

    Alas, the most of college after a time the friend groups really dissolved in February was just me alone in my own efforts. The last people I would even hang out with where the bread girl and her friends if only silently, the people of color like the group with Camile that one day and frankly people who were not even attached to any friend group. Its to be said a person became accustomed to becoming a lone writer and a person with their own gambit no one was out to achieve. They entertained theirselves and planned for the future. I think planning for the future is good, don't you think?

    I realize now after basically completing my comic goals and college education that perhaps there was no chance to even get help in these endeavors and a person should not have even thought of getting help from other people. People in the world of college and comics are equally useless and so set up in their contrived little realities. I did come across a reddit post and then a facebook post about people with similar goals but I did not help them because ultimately there are two types of people; people who take your hard earned methods for theirselves and people who hate you because you ever try to help them out creatively and your way is not how they see things aka the girl who made fun of Zino Flyboy. I find it odd that people just assume comics are for kids but never consider if so-why cannot they do it if it was for kids and just at that thought level? Why cannot they do it if they weren't kids who became adults? Logically they should be able to do it. But no one of these haters can even draw foremost. I think enough that I built my own space for my own self and reclaimed what little of a college experience and productivity for myself towards my goals that could be done with what little a person had. I look back on some people's facebook posts and I just realize how I just spent time with undisciplined losers who cried in the summer 2014 because they could not go out at night as they did on the campus. Some people actually have real problems like your parents trying to destroy and up every one of your goals for their own linear fearful and contrived thinking. I am to say a person made the mistake of thinking so highly about some women when they would just add into that same madness as their parents.