Big questions posed is that really

 I try for humble beginnings and I will try again. I try for the humble beginning to get the girl and then I will try again. Greatly everything I do has been spoiled and fucked up. Like geezus mate, for what have I done to deserve this crap? I would say not one thing. I would beg and plead for people to get common sense and cease their harmful behavior but it does not work like that. People need to be put in their place. The Big question posed is how that people can do these things and no one give a fuck until its too late. Eh, when those people came to attack me when they did and the twisted reveal of who they were actually-it be too late to repair things. The fact you even find a could be lover going at you like this instead of talking to you is stupid. You think that doing this is going to make me not exist. You are the embarassment not me. All of it is so hideously stupid. I am done with it. I felt like smacking a bitch in that whole fucking experience. I restrained myself realizing if a person truly gave into anger then it would never end. NO one wants to be bothered by people who come about a person in a "spooky behavior at a distance" type of deal. Like bruh, leave me alone! 

You already live your privileged fucked up life to even think what you are doing is right. You don't even know what the fuck you were doing and how close a person was to smacking the living shit out of you. You indignatly think you are superior. Please. You were so close to that edge for years and its only because I get better and write things that things do not escalate but you escalated something common place being selfish. You ruined love for me. You all did. You selfish nasty fucking people who dareth call yourself women? Call you as you are; nothing but parasites on a humble and yet earnest person which is me, dumbos. I would love to go on a trip with friends but no comics and learning them takes priority. I would like to go on a trip to these places for the various fucking trips across the year. How about a spring trip? A summer trip? A christmas trip? No, we forget a fall and thanksgiving trip where you visit the native americans. Like fuck! The level of privilege you insufferable bastards have is too much.

I go on and out of my way to be so nice to your behinds when you never deserved it. I thought people could grow together. I was seeing the future but all you dicks are shortsighted. I would say the other word but like bruh; you people are dicks. You very well know what a person was trying to do! You fucked it all up because you could not even wait, trust or even really love a person and you want to make such an effort to contact a person in these very" spooky at a distance" means and pretend you don't live me and that you have some valid agenda against me. No, you fucking don't. If no one tells you this in life is that you are nobody for this. You try so hard for attention, control and power but in the end you lost everything. You lost me, you lost yourself-your true self and not someone some creep at the top made you to be, and ultimately you lost your humanity. That spark of youth, that creativity and all that could have been; you made it the best you could to be something ugly.

These days have been the hardest days of what a person has been trying to do. Realizing that no matter how much you work on the comics on the side no one gives a fuck. Lol. Like there has been 500 girls and all of you people can do is say, " who gives a fuck". I really gotta say that a person has to do it a 100%. Not expect rewards! No trips. Just the benefit of completing the dream. Focus on the dream and nothing else but it never had to be like this but you people made the world like this for me. Never considering its wrong to think you are entitled to a person's whole life and their future children when you refuse to even look at them. You think I am fucking ugly. Yea, good for you-go fuck yourself because it really does not matter. Notrhing you do matters. Not even that advent stopped shit. I am Thomas the fucking train. I promise you that you want a person to reach each of your calamations! Then I will and best your calamatia. You get it. No you don't because all you fuckers are dumb. Fake genuises and just cheated through school and ultimately the level of cringe I feel looking at you people in the past through my mind's eye is just something I feel embarrassed by. How dare you forget me and forget your manners in how to speak to people or treat them. How dareth you entrap me and deny me love that I could get somewhere else that you always trying to corrupt someone else. Enough. You are not innocent.

I just say its good to express real rage and hatred after such a long time pretending everything is still good. No, fuck you people. There is something a person likes and its called people who appreciates a person's space. Its not nice what you have done and surely you will find that you may not wish you had done it soon. I made you people truly feel like princesses of the world that you thought you had such a handle of reality when you don't. You are just kept people and if a person caring about you and not wanting you to be fucking brutalized is a crime and such a crime to come after a person for-you truly are not deserving of such protection. You deserve all and more of what you put me through. The social ostracization, the physical and mental injury, the lack of creative anything being fulfilled without struggle from you and all the riff raff you bring in. The big question is that can you ponder what is going to happen when my train of progress moves past you and I really don't even remember you? Oh, I give you the answer. You are going to learn that maybe the world is a much harder place than what you are led to constantly believe.