sleeping on a promise.
There are many things that I can say about now, that are not pleasant and I will say them directly now.
People just don't care about getting ahead. The board of directors have failed. " They have real lives".
I worked tiredlessly hard on the projects of Krushre, Romu and beyond. I came to the conclusion these ideas were not complete yet or would be for awhile if I just did them myself. The board of directors were supposed to support me and help me create ideas and even the comics and products theirselves. But I guess its just not that important to many of these people,"with real lives" don't give a jack. I would continue creating but I would be doing it in rage and hatred of certain people who have half assed turned from their assignment just because of some negative elements of persuasion from others. I would continue creating but you can not length/lift things with an uncertain weight or height. Alone, and much less without the necessary angles. To be torn apart that would be.
Many people don't know that authors, preachers, writers and other creators can not do things that require a lot of thought and motive and form in one go! You cannot just say, " hey, let's finish all these 300 stories today" without a plan or preparation or any prior prepared materials. A rock climber cannot say, " let's climb, Everest!" Without any preparation or equipment. For one, he would freeze to death! Trying to do these things are like killing yourself and you will get mortally sick. People in the real world experience this a lot. From celebrity known writers, creators and authors to artists, it happens a lot.
Where you just over do it!
I guess, I was just being selfish! Wanting to complete these stories with a group of people. But as a leader, I have failed. As a motivator, I have failed. Failed, to realize these people do not give a damn, about the work at all. Or rather the majority!
I have failed, placing trust in people who really don't care.
I meant for Krushre and Romu and the rest to be stuff to work on with others and it was fun for a while! Of course it was.
I vaguely recall writing this some months ago and not posting it:here.
I should not have to beg nor plead for anyone's assistance like I'm the one who bothered them in the first place. You agreed to do it! You should pay up!
You shouldn't leave your promises to nothing and just let em go!
Vicious people are behind closed doors!
I have had to change universities for this reason, because people where too secretly hostile in their attempts to overtly screw me over. For some reason I just dont know, its just like everyone who could support me as an ally is pushed away by those who want to pester me! Those who want to ensure I fail.
I does not take ten attempts for me to realize your true intentions, why in the hell would a person commit to something and then change halfway! Maybe because they are lazy, maybe because they don't care or maybe someone is just feeding them a lot of trash. And they are eating this trash.
People can be convinced that they want to have sex, but after want to realize they were wronged into sex and the products of sex.Or in other words after wanting sex backing out of even being bothered with the circumstances of the sex, try to change the allowed consensual into the loud unconsensual! People don't want to stay true to what they know happened. They want to make believe things when they have a failing out with holding true to the truth of the matter of the circumstance!
The same can be said the opposite way around too! ( where unconsensual is made into consenusual, due to pressure from society!)
But the point is, that some people just cannot abide to hold the truth, their promise and the pledge that they made!People want to act like you done wrong when they cannot handle or perform to the agreed form!
I just tried to live a reality in which simpletons can relate. What this shows me, this absolute betrayal, is that you should not have to even please people in such a compromising fashion! I am tired. Of having to be hinder by people who are to help. I am tired of living in a world where I'm always the enemy or the victim! (fill free to skip the following rant-does not matter to me),
I tell myself.
And I just can't accept the values of people here which are so laughable and so shameful.
I won't tell anyone the reason of my work ethic but not everyone is alotted to live in this society where you are free to make blunders abundant in terms of completing what you want to do, and still be around tomorrow. People are still killed like animals, women are still socially tortured, and people cannot truly love or find the ways to. The world is dying because people refuse to come together and advance. In the bible there is a tale of a city where people all came together and lived, but this was not right in the eye of God. Why was this not right? Because perhaps they turned a blind eye to everyone else and probably even try to suppose that others not apart of them are not even human, or that they were higher than human theirselves.
I believe in dual duality of the bible. There are real dates in the bible. It is "claimily" vague.
The city or the society in which is referred could actually mean modern society of the west.
Often many people of the west, forget about the east and really do not care about anyone but theirselves. You can see this in the feminist movement which is basically mostly white women of a certain nasty degree complaining about men of what they proclaim to be the hierarchy. Or rather the patriarchy, which are white men in their definition, They fail to realize that they exclude most men on the planet and are blowing out a problem using media and text vanced hatred towards men to try to solve this "problem". However no one told you to get married to some jerk asshole who probably bullied many people. No one told you to generalize women and men to only the white skin color!
Yet, become enraged when people mention that women go through far worse than they even claim to go through! Work! Pay! Only you are so lucky to be privileged to have these things. If unfortunate to be born in a place like Saudi Arabia, the only work you would have is most likely childcare and the only pay, is not anything at all! Yet what do you make of these things, you do absouletely nothing to solve the solution but talk and talk and instigate! That's what some creators seem to always be doing!
Talking and never doing.
It was going to be sweet. Me and my company of pals( improper word structure in a sentence but carries meaning). We where to create these series. Draft them all in each their own way then hand them to me, to further draft with my completion method all the way through all the series. Then write the prompts and make publications out of them with accompanying art, " I SEE MODERN".
Next we were to actually draw frame by frame while adding the text bubbles. Next was to be coloring! And then finally the era of publication! Possibly having the world record of independently published works allowing us to excel as the new comic lords and gals! I sigh. The cow jumped over the moon, IT FUCKING DID! And crashed in a ball of merries!
Nonsense. was it to consider the help of others who had not even proved their worth not ambition nor skill! When I had done the work myself most of all and in general, I had gotten to this point on my own blood.
I tell you.
I did not get any help.
I did not get any help.
I did not get any fucking help!
Jack fucking sparrow! (lol!)
Binoral help it was. Help that is only motivating when people continue to badger you.
I am not a girl.
I am not gay.
And if I like pink, is because I like pink and not because I am gay!
I am tried of people showing theirselves as fools and not even trying to anything at all.
I might love you, but many people I love, are guilty of this shite too,
Its like a fucking disease.
Complain about this and complain about that.
I never heard so much complaining from some weaklings who have trouble handing stuff that I can do easily. And which is not hard to do at all.
Why bother with people who hesitate!
Why bother with people who are not their best nor try to be!
Why bother with people who come with the metric, " WE CAN NOT CHANGE THE WORLD!"
I pause. One time, I fell in love with a lesbian, she was very weird, untidy and wonky amongst other things, But I liked her for her spirit! Not essentially the fact that she was pretty. Nor the fact that she was a lesbian. But that she tried her hardest to succeed.Falling asleep at her work. She came with a will that said, " I CAN CHANGE THE WORLD!" I can be something more than what this world says I can be.
But, the fact of the matter is I liked her because I saw myself in her. She inspired me to an extent and I was very attracted to her for this reason that she had the attitude that she could" change the world".
I just can't believe that sometimes, it was her that sidelined me or discounted me as an enemy.
What this taught me is that people often do not understand your actions nor try to, just live in their won thinking of their living and their reality.
Never considering their reality.
Over the years, there have been many girls I could never attempt to date. Girls wondered why I didn't respond well when they were giving me a hint. Or just being friendly. I admit, I tried so hard to fit the mold that men cannot be broken by women. That it is all the man's fault if a relationship goes awry. But I didn't know jack shite about any romantic theme in those days.
But its true, that there is an equal fault possibility in any relationship that crumbles.
Or rather putting too much trust into someone you dont even know who is not who you envision them as. In this one unposted post. I reveal an attempt to get a girlfriend, which did injure me a lot in my mindset and my own thought of being "worthy". Being pestered all my life by utter bs nonsense from anyone older than me or younger than me. I started to believe I had to be worthy of frienship and worthy of love. But that was absolute bullshit. I had not done anything in my life to harm anyone, never did I fight anyone at all in a fist fight. But yet, I had started to believe the bs that people had taunted me with.
That you are useless with friends. And not useful to society if you can't socialize well.
I tried so hard to be optimistic in a hellish place. That good friends existed in a run down shite school where even the higher education students where just good cheaters and only a sum of some actual hard workers. In short, I found myself at the short end of the stick, with a person who I could not even relate to as the person I had I thought I had fallen in love. The person I liked that I saw in that person never existed and was for someone else, somewhere else, somehow else! I often relate the concept of different realities. Because this individual just was not anyone I could fall for and I soon questioned why I did. Was it meant on purpose for me to realize I did not love a person who I felt so highly of when I first saw her? How often I found my ideals to reach for betrayed. The one person I consider a friend true was the person who laughed at me, in this ordeal that I had to deal with.
I could not let the shite go. Because, it seemed like a spell in which I was placed under so that I could be screwed up and have very hard troubles even trying to talk to anybody at all.
When I went to college, this girl. I saw, was texting and I was making a rapture with my mouth, rather humming. And when I went to say hello, she did not say anything at all. I had thought I could escape the trap that someone had set for me! But it seemed like it followed me there.
I realized the someones where the people who continued in the backdrop to represent bullshit sentiments that its all your fault that you do not have friends and that people do not accept you!
And directly moreso, the doubt inside that you are a good enough person to live in this society!
But we are more than good enough to live in such a shitty place, when we reach for our goals.
But I would not realize this till much later!
I placed too much ability in others and none in myself. That I would need friends to reach my goal and not my own will power. I found out in a tried manner that if you do not make the decision yourself to do something in your own power it will never get done, because people of this world are not socially advanced to be in a place to help you unless they are of real true character to help others.
Thus, I never figured out that I just had to be strong enough to get up again and again. But I was never strong enough. The event of highschool had still not passed from my heart and I had trouble even recognizing what love was. That is how disassociated with the world, I was. I was swaying. No conviction at all that I was a good guy, I could not try to commit to these people when I thought that you had to have money and a car to even have a relationship with people. But that is not so.
It was a rather juvenile thing to think. But the anxiety of that previous encounter with that girl I later chatted with shortly on friendly terms, forever made me scared of ever talking to anyone-girl or guy on a phone. Because people like to dig into their phones and stay away from talking towards anyone else. To be like a pest you are when talking to such people who do not even look up from their phones. Its like you are walking in on people having sex and start talking to them.
Even these days, I have trouble speaking to anyone about pointe turn on their phones.
I can never relax these days or even in those days because I felt unsafe and uneasy around certain easily upsettable people. And the vibe through the air was similar to the time I felt the twinge in my heart, the one where shortly after in an attempt for love I was brutally misguided that I would have love! Instead, I found my brain and my way of living fucked over like someone had impaled me in the head with some sharp skewer. I truly feared for my life and I from past experiences began to notice that life is not warranted. I tried to ensure that no one would die for me, as I truly felt a dying deadly presence towards me. I wanted not one thing to include anyone into this fold of uncertain danger I felt. Because this feeling was no lie. Everytime, I second guessed it, I ended up nearly dying in some fashion. Whether its almost being runned over by a bus or a car or something else (iemtirely.)
I felt a torture and I was not bringing anyone into such a circle to possible suffer as I have. To know silent pain is a horrible thing.
And otherwise I was screwed.
My point (entirely) is, that I have sacrificed much for my goals and even the safety of others. Is it so hard for other people to do the same, to sacrifice for a goal. But I guess not, people have been conditioned in this society that you just have to work for things and that its going to even be that simple to accomplish any one goal in a well true off manner, But its not, while people think they have ley way to slack, there is none.Because hard work alone with no get you to the place you need to be, sacrifice.
The failure, I have experience today just shows how hard I need to work so that one willing individual can easily make 300 series over time. It has taken long to explain this, but I will tell you what this has for the future of this site and brand.
I WILL CONTINUE!
To not sleep on a promise.
I will:
Continue to develop the many series myself and only by myself, of course this will need a new direction so I am going to make this site about studying different artists I find to like and their art styles. This includes what inspires me in this time period. I will be talking about pictures and visuals and I will talk my way, dream my way through the remaining bunch. Then I will draft them all.
Next I have decide the H-manga line up.
Along with the novels line up.
I will be focusing on projects that are large.
I will be working on the petals of fear.
And I will continue to work on mysterious and changer as if nothing happened.
But I will not be so vocal only about the ideas I have to draft. But you will not know the true name of these ideas until the publication date.
This is not going to be hard.
This is going to be very fun.
It is all about the landscape in which you come from.
The angle. Lets make this all about angles and realities and not sleep on a promise!
Thank you for reading this absurd long ramble of things.
Which serves its purpose well.
@ no more teamwork with plebs.
Inspiration for my life.'s vision.
People just don't care about getting ahead. The board of directors have failed. " They have real lives".
I worked tiredlessly hard on the projects of Krushre, Romu and beyond. I came to the conclusion these ideas were not complete yet or would be for awhile if I just did them myself. The board of directors were supposed to support me and help me create ideas and even the comics and products theirselves. But I guess its just not that important to many of these people,"with real lives" don't give a jack. I would continue creating but I would be doing it in rage and hatred of certain people who have half assed turned from their assignment just because of some negative elements of persuasion from others. I would continue creating but you can not length/lift things with an uncertain weight or height. Alone, and much less without the necessary angles. To be torn apart that would be.
Many people don't know that authors, preachers, writers and other creators can not do things that require a lot of thought and motive and form in one go! You cannot just say, " hey, let's finish all these 300 stories today" without a plan or preparation or any prior prepared materials. A rock climber cannot say, " let's climb, Everest!" Without any preparation or equipment. For one, he would freeze to death! Trying to do these things are like killing yourself and you will get mortally sick. People in the real world experience this a lot. From celebrity known writers, creators and authors to artists, it happens a lot.
Where you just over do it!
I guess, I was just being selfish! Wanting to complete these stories with a group of people. But as a leader, I have failed. As a motivator, I have failed. Failed, to realize these people do not give a damn, about the work at all. Or rather the majority!
I have failed, placing trust in people who really don't care.
I meant for Krushre and Romu and the rest to be stuff to work on with others and it was fun for a while! Of course it was.
I vaguely recall writing this some months ago and not posting it:here.
I should not have to beg nor plead for anyone's assistance like I'm the one who bothered them in the first place. You agreed to do it! You should pay up!
You shouldn't leave your promises to nothing and just let em go!
Vicious people are behind closed doors!
I have had to change universities for this reason, because people where too secretly hostile in their attempts to overtly screw me over. For some reason I just dont know, its just like everyone who could support me as an ally is pushed away by those who want to pester me! Those who want to ensure I fail.
I does not take ten attempts for me to realize your true intentions, why in the hell would a person commit to something and then change halfway! Maybe because they are lazy, maybe because they don't care or maybe someone is just feeding them a lot of trash. And they are eating this trash.
People can be convinced that they want to have sex, but after want to realize they were wronged into sex and the products of sex.Or in other words after wanting sex backing out of even being bothered with the circumstances of the sex, try to change the allowed consensual into the loud unconsensual! People don't want to stay true to what they know happened. They want to make believe things when they have a failing out with holding true to the truth of the matter of the circumstance!
The same can be said the opposite way around too! ( where unconsensual is made into consenusual, due to pressure from society!)
But the point is, that some people just cannot abide to hold the truth, their promise and the pledge that they made!People want to act like you done wrong when they cannot handle or perform to the agreed form!
I just tried to live a reality in which simpletons can relate. What this shows me, this absolute betrayal, is that you should not have to even please people in such a compromising fashion! I am tired. Of having to be hinder by people who are to help. I am tired of living in a world where I'm always the enemy or the victim! (fill free to skip the following rant-does not matter to me),
Sincerly, once I got through with the drafts of the 1st Mysterious and Changer volume, after much research on my own part,, I went of course to see how everyone was doing on their own parts. They were supposed to be finishing up their alotted quarter of projects to create ideas and artwork for and some drafts as well for a section of people. Which was just cherry wishful thinking that people would be able to abide by the schedule and the allotted tasks that should be completed. Here I am, ready to launch and these people HAVE NOT EVEN STARTED! Fuck! Are you fucking serious!? Knowing that I would be depending on this. And knowing the benefits they could reap. That is of course, having the use of my services( as I have not shared the methods with anyone but myself) to create their own brands of stories. Its just a no deal done.I just don't belong in this society.
It all fell threw. I seriously lost my shit.
Shiute, Shute, and Shitejarka!
But then I was relieved.
These are not the fuckers I should be even entering a business with!
These are not the people I should be forced to deal with!
I just thought that having escaped a life of being teased and tortured while a youth, would not happen ever again, I'm finding out that this society is just of this trash and this wanton mess. That people seem to think IS FUCKING ACCEPTABLE! Its not by any standards or metric!
What the fuck have I done to you?
Do I even really even know you that well to do anything to harm you?
Maybe you're racist or against the grain of knowledge.
Maybe you are really dumb!
FUCKING DUMB!
Do I even know you well to steal your girl, stranger guy?
Am I gay to even steal you guy, stranger guy.
I don't have to be friendly, with everyone you know.
When all there is, is a jack load of shitty people trying to crunch me, just by site of me.
They don't even know me, but once they see me, for some reason, they are my enemy!
Always wonder, prospective mate, why I cant date you?
Wonder why, there will always be some shite asshole who tries to reference me as some enemy, some punching bag to not throw a real punch but one that hurts in the social sense.
Cock blocking is what people can relate this too. But for so long,
for most of my life and exclusivity to these five years! I've been a target for some real shit!
FUCK!
I've just about lost it. But I cannot lose it.
Because everyone can back out what they meant by those words. by those actions and those subtle insults! I've tried to make it not about me. I've tried. But it fails.
Because I am just exhibiting self hatred by not sharing my own views and beliefs and knowledge.
The world could be a sunny anime with cute girls in highschool friendship but it could be really a zombie show where people are being devoured and the main cast are just survivors in fear and delusion. I won't delude myself any longer.
I tell myself.
And I just can't accept the values of people here which are so laughable and so shameful.
I won't tell anyone the reason of my work ethic but not everyone is alotted to live in this society where you are free to make blunders abundant in terms of completing what you want to do, and still be around tomorrow. People are still killed like animals, women are still socially tortured, and people cannot truly love or find the ways to. The world is dying because people refuse to come together and advance. In the bible there is a tale of a city where people all came together and lived, but this was not right in the eye of God. Why was this not right? Because perhaps they turned a blind eye to everyone else and probably even try to suppose that others not apart of them are not even human, or that they were higher than human theirselves.
I believe in dual duality of the bible. There are real dates in the bible. It is "claimily" vague.
The city or the society in which is referred could actually mean modern society of the west.
Often many people of the west, forget about the east and really do not care about anyone but theirselves. You can see this in the feminist movement which is basically mostly white women of a certain nasty degree complaining about men of what they proclaim to be the hierarchy. Or rather the patriarchy, which are white men in their definition, They fail to realize that they exclude most men on the planet and are blowing out a problem using media and text vanced hatred towards men to try to solve this "problem". However no one told you to get married to some jerk asshole who probably bullied many people. No one told you to generalize women and men to only the white skin color!
Yet, become enraged when people mention that women go through far worse than they even claim to go through! Work! Pay! Only you are so lucky to be privileged to have these things. If unfortunate to be born in a place like Saudi Arabia, the only work you would have is most likely childcare and the only pay, is not anything at all! Yet what do you make of these things, you do absouletely nothing to solve the solution but talk and talk and instigate! That's what some creators seem to always be doing!
Talking and never doing.
It was going to be sweet. Me and my company of pals( improper word structure in a sentence but carries meaning). We where to create these series. Draft them all in each their own way then hand them to me, to further draft with my completion method all the way through all the series. Then write the prompts and make publications out of them with accompanying art, " I SEE MODERN".
Next we were to actually draw frame by frame while adding the text bubbles. Next was to be coloring! And then finally the era of publication! Possibly having the world record of independently published works allowing us to excel as the new comic lords and gals! I sigh. The cow jumped over the moon, IT FUCKING DID! And crashed in a ball of merries!
Nonsense. was it to consider the help of others who had not even proved their worth not ambition nor skill! When I had done the work myself most of all and in general, I had gotten to this point on my own blood.
I tell you.
I did not get any help.
I did not get any help.
I did not get any fucking help!
Jack fucking sparrow! (lol!)
Binoral help it was. Help that is only motivating when people continue to badger you.
I am not a girl.
I am not gay.
And if I like pink, is because I like pink and not because I am gay!
I am tried of people showing theirselves as fools and not even trying to anything at all.
I might love you, but many people I love, are guilty of this shite too,
Its like a fucking disease.
Complain about this and complain about that.
I never heard so much complaining from some weaklings who have trouble handing stuff that I can do easily. And which is not hard to do at all.
Why bother with people who hesitate!
Why bother with people who are not their best nor try to be!
Why bother with people who come with the metric, " WE CAN NOT CHANGE THE WORLD!"
I pause. One time, I fell in love with a lesbian, she was very weird, untidy and wonky amongst other things, But I liked her for her spirit! Not essentially the fact that she was pretty. Nor the fact that she was a lesbian. But that she tried her hardest to succeed.Falling asleep at her work. She came with a will that said, " I CAN CHANGE THE WORLD!" I can be something more than what this world says I can be.
But, the fact of the matter is I liked her because I saw myself in her. She inspired me to an extent and I was very attracted to her for this reason that she had the attitude that she could" change the world".
I just can't believe that sometimes, it was her that sidelined me or discounted me as an enemy.
What this taught me is that people often do not understand your actions nor try to, just live in their won thinking of their living and their reality.
Never considering their reality.
Over the years, there have been many girls I could never attempt to date. Girls wondered why I didn't respond well when they were giving me a hint. Or just being friendly. I admit, I tried so hard to fit the mold that men cannot be broken by women. That it is all the man's fault if a relationship goes awry. But I didn't know jack shite about any romantic theme in those days.
But its true, that there is an equal fault possibility in any relationship that crumbles.
Or rather putting too much trust into someone you dont even know who is not who you envision them as. In this one unposted post. I reveal an attempt to get a girlfriend, which did injure me a lot in my mindset and my own thought of being "worthy". Being pestered all my life by utter bs nonsense from anyone older than me or younger than me. I started to believe I had to be worthy of frienship and worthy of love. But that was absolute bullshit. I had not done anything in my life to harm anyone, never did I fight anyone at all in a fist fight. But yet, I had started to believe the bs that people had taunted me with.
That you are useless with friends. And not useful to society if you can't socialize well.
I tried so hard to be optimistic in a hellish place. That good friends existed in a run down shite school where even the higher education students where just good cheaters and only a sum of some actual hard workers. In short, I found myself at the short end of the stick, with a person who I could not even relate to as the person I had I thought I had fallen in love. The person I liked that I saw in that person never existed and was for someone else, somewhere else, somehow else! I often relate the concept of different realities. Because this individual just was not anyone I could fall for and I soon questioned why I did. Was it meant on purpose for me to realize I did not love a person who I felt so highly of when I first saw her? How often I found my ideals to reach for betrayed. The one person I consider a friend true was the person who laughed at me, in this ordeal that I had to deal with.
I could not let the shite go. Because, it seemed like a spell in which I was placed under so that I could be screwed up and have very hard troubles even trying to talk to anybody at all.
When I went to college, this girl. I saw, was texting and I was making a rapture with my mouth, rather humming. And when I went to say hello, she did not say anything at all. I had thought I could escape the trap that someone had set for me! But it seemed like it followed me there.
I realized the someones where the people who continued in the backdrop to represent bullshit sentiments that its all your fault that you do not have friends and that people do not accept you!
And directly moreso, the doubt inside that you are a good enough person to live in this society!
But we are more than good enough to live in such a shitty place, when we reach for our goals.
But I would not realize this till much later!
I placed too much ability in others and none in myself. That I would need friends to reach my goal and not my own will power. I found out in a tried manner that if you do not make the decision yourself to do something in your own power it will never get done, because people of this world are not socially advanced to be in a place to help you unless they are of real true character to help others.
Thus, I never figured out that I just had to be strong enough to get up again and again. But I was never strong enough. The event of highschool had still not passed from my heart and I had trouble even recognizing what love was. That is how disassociated with the world, I was. I was swaying. No conviction at all that I was a good guy, I could not try to commit to these people when I thought that you had to have money and a car to even have a relationship with people. But that is not so.
It was a rather juvenile thing to think. But the anxiety of that previous encounter with that girl I later chatted with shortly on friendly terms, forever made me scared of ever talking to anyone-girl or guy on a phone. Because people like to dig into their phones and stay away from talking towards anyone else. To be like a pest you are when talking to such people who do not even look up from their phones. Its like you are walking in on people having sex and start talking to them.
Even these days, I have trouble speaking to anyone about pointe turn on their phones.
I can never relax these days or even in those days because I felt unsafe and uneasy around certain easily upsettable people. And the vibe through the air was similar to the time I felt the twinge in my heart, the one where shortly after in an attempt for love I was brutally misguided that I would have love! Instead, I found my brain and my way of living fucked over like someone had impaled me in the head with some sharp skewer. I truly feared for my life and I from past experiences began to notice that life is not warranted. I tried to ensure that no one would die for me, as I truly felt a dying deadly presence towards me. I wanted not one thing to include anyone into this fold of uncertain danger I felt. Because this feeling was no lie. Everytime, I second guessed it, I ended up nearly dying in some fashion. Whether its almost being runned over by a bus or a car or something else (iemtirely.)
I felt a torture and I was not bringing anyone into such a circle to possible suffer as I have. To know silent pain is a horrible thing.
And otherwise I was screwed.
My point (entirely) is, that I have sacrificed much for my goals and even the safety of others. Is it so hard for other people to do the same, to sacrifice for a goal. But I guess not, people have been conditioned in this society that you just have to work for things and that its going to even be that simple to accomplish any one goal in a well true off manner, But its not, while people think they have ley way to slack, there is none.Because hard work alone with no get you to the place you need to be, sacrifice.
The failure, I have experience today just shows how hard I need to work so that one willing individual can easily make 300 series over time. It has taken long to explain this, but I will tell you what this has for the future of this site and brand.
I WILL CONTINUE!
To not sleep on a promise.
I will:
Continue to develop the many series myself and only by myself, of course this will need a new direction so I am going to make this site about studying different artists I find to like and their art styles. This includes what inspires me in this time period. I will be talking about pictures and visuals and I will talk my way, dream my way through the remaining bunch. Then I will draft them all.
Next I have decide the H-manga line up.
Along with the novels line up.
I will be focusing on projects that are large.
I will be working on the petals of fear.
And I will continue to work on mysterious and changer as if nothing happened.
But I will not be so vocal only about the ideas I have to draft. But you will not know the true name of these ideas until the publication date.
This is not going to be hard.
This is going to be very fun.
It is all about the landscape in which you come from.
The angle. Lets make this all about angles and realities and not sleep on a promise!
Thank you for reading this absurd long ramble of things.
Which serves its purpose well.
@ no more teamwork with plebs.
Inspiration for my life.'s vision.
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