Adventure One
That day after the enthrallment was made. I felt sick. I was about to lose my mind. Things were so hard to do, in a body which my body thought it was but wasn't. I used to draw about 12 frames or one page per 30 minutes or 15 minutes but now, I was snail speed and my body hurt and my mind was fading. I was also so lonely, but this body made me think I had some type of support and friends.
I admit, I was jealous of such a weak frame and such support that came with it. I thought I wanted love, but could I love someone I am so jealous of, I thought. Trying my best to adapt as that was my shoulder's mission, being a former first captain and all.
That first day, even though I felt sick, I felt so happy. At least a friend was promised I thought to myself. But I was totally wrong I found out in the two or three weeks this pain would be about me.
I told myself I was enduring the pain for her. But eventually, I lost sight of that and became more selfish in my resolve. It was not like I had not, other women that I liked.
And all this time, whisked away from situations, I could never decide which one I liked.
In this society, there has to be "one you like". You cant say that you like them all, or you'd be some type of criminal. But still, there was no other solution to my problems, polygamist ideals were my go to solution, but the way I was feeling about this girl meant that option would go away. That I would be force to commit, is the feeling I felt.
I was drawing in some main lobby of a maths, political science and history building on the campus.
And that place, catches the beats of nasty glares and undertones of violence. The people there are usually disgruntled folk and some of them are of the same kind as me, just a bit weaker or way weak and on the same or different alignment. The people glare at me in this building drawing the stories I draw and some say, " what is he doing here," " Get out, you retard" is what they say in their selfish stares. It is quiet interesting that people feel the need to interject their emotions and biases and utter evil, views upon which a person they think exists, but never does at all. People go out of their way to harm strangers just by their eyes, how is it the world even has a structure and that people do not go out and just murder anyone they don't see as anyone they can understand from their limited cultural experience.
Maybe because there is an exact order beneath the world of citizens and governments that control the people even if they do not notice they are being controlled, we call this order pstates. Different places have different pstates and who rules them differs from location to location. Its all about who is powerful or sovereign in a certain matter.
Else, the world probably would not even exist as it does today.
And some smile and some look on in envy, some look on in support and there is an odd one or two or three who compliments the work in the manner in coming up directly to me. Many people like to say stuff under their breaths and not even care that it makes them look like cowards. In the world of my dealings, everything is said forefront and if you can't manage that, you are a coward.
A freak. At least from my viewpoint.
But unfortunately I'll never be that forward in actuality,
Especially when it comes to women.
There is a certain reason and certain cause.
When I can't speak my mind or even feel comfortable speaking, its like someone is threatening my life or others lives are being threatened. Its a feeling you get used to after nearly dying many times, people who don't know the feeling of death, near death are so gracious to their linear simplisitcity of naive beliefs that they do not know the feeling. But once you know the feeling, its hard to live without it dictating your decisions..
I wont speak much more on the topic, but that place had a high frequency of these "type of attacks".
In one second, you would be triggered as some object came dashing your way and your body was forced to interact and either get hit, murdered or injured by the object or react. In the case of that moment it, was a many group of people charging me at one time with all their weapons. Who of course where all poorly made. I basically dispatch them with ease, of course what better than a dinosaur motif of wind and fire blasting them all back onto their britches causing their real bodies to panic in such intensity! First came, a captain of some sort, next came projectiles and after that was some group of individuals who excelled at group attacks, then it was another powerful figure and then another and another, then even another agent who walked by as if it was nothing. Lastly another enemy came and even he was defeated.
In the end, I could remember all the faces and all the actions they had performed. But in this borrowed body after I had fought I was weakened. So damn tired,
I was coughing and I was nearly about to twitch out!
Dammit, I said to myself, its like all the two years of training myself to defend against these psychological attacks that I found myself weak with a bit of residing pain.
But then I started to smile and I felt some type of escapism.
She, the girl I was mysterious enthralled to, must of have been enjoying my power to do her assignments and work. But this was all a journey to find my real partners.
I admit, I was jealous of such a weak frame and such support that came with it. I thought I wanted love, but could I love someone I am so jealous of, I thought. Trying my best to adapt as that was my shoulder's mission, being a former first captain and all.
That first day, even though I felt sick, I felt so happy. At least a friend was promised I thought to myself. But I was totally wrong I found out in the two or three weeks this pain would be about me.
I told myself I was enduring the pain for her. But eventually, I lost sight of that and became more selfish in my resolve. It was not like I had not, other women that I liked.
And all this time, whisked away from situations, I could never decide which one I liked.
In this society, there has to be "one you like". You cant say that you like them all, or you'd be some type of criminal. But still, there was no other solution to my problems, polygamist ideals were my go to solution, but the way I was feeling about this girl meant that option would go away. That I would be force to commit, is the feeling I felt.
I was drawing in some main lobby of a maths, political science and history building on the campus.
And that place, catches the beats of nasty glares and undertones of violence. The people there are usually disgruntled folk and some of them are of the same kind as me, just a bit weaker or way weak and on the same or different alignment. The people glare at me in this building drawing the stories I draw and some say, " what is he doing here," " Get out, you retard" is what they say in their selfish stares. It is quiet interesting that people feel the need to interject their emotions and biases and utter evil, views upon which a person they think exists, but never does at all. People go out of their way to harm strangers just by their eyes, how is it the world even has a structure and that people do not go out and just murder anyone they don't see as anyone they can understand from their limited cultural experience.
Maybe because there is an exact order beneath the world of citizens and governments that control the people even if they do not notice they are being controlled, we call this order pstates. Different places have different pstates and who rules them differs from location to location. Its all about who is powerful or sovereign in a certain matter.
Else, the world probably would not even exist as it does today.
And some smile and some look on in envy, some look on in support and there is an odd one or two or three who compliments the work in the manner in coming up directly to me. Many people like to say stuff under their breaths and not even care that it makes them look like cowards. In the world of my dealings, everything is said forefront and if you can't manage that, you are a coward.
A freak. At least from my viewpoint.
But unfortunately I'll never be that forward in actuality,
Especially when it comes to women.
There is a certain reason and certain cause.
When I can't speak my mind or even feel comfortable speaking, its like someone is threatening my life or others lives are being threatened. Its a feeling you get used to after nearly dying many times, people who don't know the feeling of death, near death are so gracious to their linear simplisitcity of naive beliefs that they do not know the feeling. But once you know the feeling, its hard to live without it dictating your decisions..
I wont speak much more on the topic, but that place had a high frequency of these "type of attacks".
In one second, you would be triggered as some object came dashing your way and your body was forced to interact and either get hit, murdered or injured by the object or react. In the case of that moment it, was a many group of people charging me at one time with all their weapons. Who of course where all poorly made. I basically dispatch them with ease, of course what better than a dinosaur motif of wind and fire blasting them all back onto their britches causing their real bodies to panic in such intensity! First came, a captain of some sort, next came projectiles and after that was some group of individuals who excelled at group attacks, then it was another powerful figure and then another and another, then even another agent who walked by as if it was nothing. Lastly another enemy came and even he was defeated.
In the end, I could remember all the faces and all the actions they had performed. But in this borrowed body after I had fought I was weakened. So damn tired,
I was coughing and I was nearly about to twitch out!
Dammit, I said to myself, its like all the two years of training myself to defend against these psychological attacks that I found myself weak with a bit of residing pain.
But then I started to smile and I felt some type of escapism.
She, the girl I was mysterious enthralled to, must of have been enjoying my power to do her assignments and work. But this was all a journey to find my real partners.
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